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Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought Empty Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought

This post has in-line assessment comments.Tue Jul 23, 2019 4:34 am

Shiro Shiro no Mi


Devil Fruit: Shiro Shiro no Mi
Devil Fruit Type: Paramecia

Devil Fruit Appearance: The Shiro Shiro no Mi resembles a dragon fruit with rectangular swirls, making it resemble brick.
Devil Fruit Description: The Shiro Shiro no Mi is a Paramecia-type Devil Fruit that allows the user to become a living fortress, making the user a Castle Human. The design of the fortress can be designed by the user, manifesting traits like tank treads, cannons, and gun turrets. The user can also store things inside of them, including a large number of people. The user also has full control of what happens inside of their fortress, such as redesigning it at will even if there are people inside of them. The fortress can be broken out of by jumping out any windows, hatches, exits or simply breaking the fortress open. Damaging the inside of the fortress damages the user proportional to the damage done to the infrastructure.

Fighting Style: The Strongest Dreadnought
Weapon Utilization: Marissa utilizes her weaponry along with her devil fruit, storing them inside her body when not in use.
Description: Marissa uses the Shiro Shiro no Mi to become a humanoid battleship-shaped fortress, or to use the weapons of said fortress in her human form, combining her weapons with the style to make it less reliant on her devil fruit alone.




Toggled Abilities:




Passive Abilities:




Haki:





Techniques
(The following techniques can either be all devil fruit techniques, or a combination of devil fruit, and natural/weapon techniques)



Light Techniques:

Medium Techniques:

Heavy Techniques:

AoE Techniques:





Last edited by Marissa Galloway on Tue Feb 11, 2020 6:57 pm; edited 14 times in total
Anonymous
Guest
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Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought Empty Re: Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought

This post has in-line assessment comments.Tue Jul 23, 2019 4:54 am
Looks good to me, waiting for a second approval on this.
Gray
Gray
The Conqueror / Black Fist
[tracker=/t131-tracker-gray-starks#504]
Name : Gray
Epithet : "The Conqueror"; "Black Fist"
Age : 49
Height : 10'2" (310 cm)
Weight : 1043 lbs (473 kg)
Species/Tribe : Cyborg Human
Faction : Pirate
World Position : Lurking Legend (Former Yonkou)
Crew : Black Fist Pirates (Destroyed)
Ship : Sangria's Vane (Destroyed)
Crew Role : Captain (Former)
Devil Fruit : Pressure-Pressure Fruit
Bounty : [ber=r] 5,000,000,000
EXP Bonus : +0.20 (to all allies)
Income Bonus : +0.20
Shop Discount : -30%
Balance : [bel] 25,000,000,000
[[strollingdeath]][[baneoftheweak]][[riseandshine]][[childofdestiny]][[freakofnature]]
[[punchoutguru]][[dulcetvirtuoso]]

[[improviseadaptovercome]]
Posts : 3983

Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought Empty Re: Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought

This post has in-line assessment comments.Tue Jul 23, 2019 6:11 pm
Mook Repellent and Powder Ignition need to have their stat changes balanced. Everything else looks good.
ObviouslyBestGirl wrote:

Shiro Shiro no Mi


Devil Fruit: Shiro Shiro no Mi
Devil Fruit Type: Paramecia

Devil Fruit Appearance: The Shiro Shiro no Mi resembles a dragon fruit with rectangular swirls, making it resemble brick.
Devil Fruit Description: The Shiro Shiro no Mi is a Paramecia-type Devil Fruit that allows the user to become a living fortress, making the user a Castle Human. The design of the fortress can be designed by the user, manifesting traits like tank treads, cannons, and gun turrets. The user can also store things inside of them, including a large number of people. The user also has full control of what happens inside of their fortress, such as redesigning it at will even if there are people inside of them. The fortress can be broken out of by jumping out any windows, hatches, exits or simply breaking the fortress open. Damaging the inside of the fortress damages the user proportional to the damage done to the infrastructure.

Fighting Style: The Strongest Dreadnought
Weapon Utilization: Marissa utilizes her weaponry along with her devil fruit, storing them inside her body when not in use.
Description: Marissa uses the Shiro Shiro no Mi to become a humanoid battleship-shaped fortress, or to use the weapons of said fortress in her human form, combining her weapons with the style to make it less reliant on her devil fruit alone.




Toggled Abilities:




Passive Abilities:




Haki:





Techniques
(The following techniques can either be all devil fruit techniques, or a combination of devil fruit, and natural/weapon techniques)



Light Techniques:

Medium Techniques:

Heavy Techniques:

AoE Techniques:



Anonymous
Guest
Guest

Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought Empty Re: Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought

This post has in-line assessment comments.Tue Jul 23, 2019 6:19 pm
made changes
Gray
Gray
The Conqueror / Black Fist
[tracker=/t131-tracker-gray-starks#504]
Name : Gray
Epithet : "The Conqueror"; "Black Fist"
Age : 49
Height : 10'2" (310 cm)
Weight : 1043 lbs (473 kg)
Species/Tribe : Cyborg Human
Faction : Pirate
World Position : Lurking Legend (Former Yonkou)
Crew : Black Fist Pirates (Destroyed)
Ship : Sangria's Vane (Destroyed)
Crew Role : Captain (Former)
Devil Fruit : Pressure-Pressure Fruit
Bounty : [ber=r] 5,000,000,000
EXP Bonus : +0.20 (to all allies)
Income Bonus : +0.20
Shop Discount : -30%
Balance : [bel] 25,000,000,000
[[strollingdeath]][[baneoftheweak]][[riseandshine]][[childofdestiny]][[freakofnature]]
[[punchoutguru]][[dulcetvirtuoso]]

[[improviseadaptovercome]]
Posts : 3983

Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought Empty Re: Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought

This post has in-line assessment comments.Wed Jul 24, 2019 2:58 pm
[See comments in orange please.]
Marissa Galloway wrote:


Mook Repellent
Technique Level: 1
Maximum Base Range: 10m
Cooldown: 4 Posts
Duration: 2 Posts
Buffs: N/A
Debuffs: Reflex -20%, Attack -20% [Specify here who these debuffs are affecting - the user or the target.]
Description: Marissa lowers hatches from her body, firing a quick volley of smoke bombs to blind her target with a smokescreen, reducing their Reflexes by 20% while making it harder for Marissa herself to attack through, making the user lose Reflex -20% and Attack -20%.

Powder Ignition
Technique Level: 1
Maximum Base Range: 10m
Maximum Base Radius: 2m
Cooldown: 21 Posts
Duration: 6 Posts
Buffs: N/A
Debuffs: Reflex -50%, DEF -25%, Attack -25% [Specify here who these debuffs are affecting - the user or the target.]
Description: Marissa discharges loose powder from cannons protruded from numerous hatches, making a stronger smokescreen that makes enemies in the blast radius surrounding her lose -50% Reflex while making it hard for Marissa herself to attack or defend from how thick her own smokescreen is despite the fact she made it, making the user lose Reflex -20% and Attack -20%. This lasts for the duration.

Gray
Gray
The Conqueror / Black Fist
[tracker=/t131-tracker-gray-starks#504]
Name : Gray
Epithet : "The Conqueror"; "Black Fist"
Age : 49
Height : 10'2" (310 cm)
Weight : 1043 lbs (473 kg)
Species/Tribe : Cyborg Human
Faction : Pirate
World Position : Lurking Legend (Former Yonkou)
Crew : Black Fist Pirates (Destroyed)
Ship : Sangria's Vane (Destroyed)
Crew Role : Captain (Former)
Devil Fruit : Pressure-Pressure Fruit
Bounty : [ber=r] 5,000,000,000
EXP Bonus : +0.20 (to all allies)
Income Bonus : +0.20
Shop Discount : -30%
Balance : [bel] 25,000,000,000
[[strollingdeath]][[baneoftheweak]][[riseandshine]][[childofdestiny]][[freakofnature]]
[[punchoutguru]][[dulcetvirtuoso]]

[[improviseadaptovercome]]
Posts : 3983

Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought Empty Re: Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought

This post has in-line assessment comments.Wed Jul 24, 2019 4:39 pm
Approved! You are now a proud owner of a castle.

Marissa Galloway wrote:

Shiro Shiro no Mi


Devil Fruit: Shiro Shiro no Mi
Devil Fruit Type: Paramecia

Devil Fruit Appearance: The Shiro Shiro no Mi resembles a dragon fruit with rectangular swirls, making it resemble brick.
Devil Fruit Description: The Shiro Shiro no Mi is a Paramecia-type Devil Fruit that allows the user to become a living fortress, making the user a Castle Human. The design of the fortress can be designed by the user, manifesting traits like tank treads, cannons, and gun turrets. The user can also store things inside of them, including a large number of people. The user also has full control of what happens inside of their fortress, such as redesigning it at will even if there are people inside of them. The fortress can be broken out of by jumping out any windows, hatches, exits or simply breaking the fortress open. Damaging the inside of the fortress damages the user proportional to the damage done to the infrastructure.

Fighting Style: The Strongest Dreadnought
Weapon Utilization: Marissa utilizes her weaponry along with her devil fruit, storing them inside her body when not in use.
Description: Marissa uses the Shiro Shiro no Mi to become a humanoid battleship-shaped fortress, or to use the weapons of said fortress in her human form, combining her weapons with the style to make it less reliant on her devil fruit alone.




Toggled Abilities:




Passive Abilities:




Haki:





Techniques
(The following techniques can either be all devil fruit techniques, or a combination of devil fruit, and natural/weapon techniques)



Light Techniques:

Medium Techniques:

Heavy Techniques:

AoE Techniques:



Francis
Francis
The Golden Ogre of Tequila Wolf
[tracker=/t1376-francis-charlemagne#7655]
Name : Francis Charlemagne
Epithet : "The Golden Ogre of Tequila Wolf"
Age : 28
Height : 6'1" (186 cm)
Weight : 198 lbs (90 kg)
Species/Tribe : Human
Faction : Marines
World Position : Rear Admiral
Crew : 69th Battalion
Ship : SSS Méricour
Marine Rank : Rear Admiral
Crew Role : Fleet Commander
Income Bonus : +0.10
Balance : [bel] 120,050,000
[[baneoftheweak]][[freakofnature]][[childofdestiny]]
[[improviseadaptovercome]]
Posts : 106

Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought Empty Re: Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought

This post has in-line assessment comments.Mon Feb 10, 2020 8:50 am
[ Comments in red. ]

Marissa Galloway wrote:

Shiro Shiro no Mi


Devil Fruit: Shiro Shiro no Mi
Devil Fruit Type: Paramecia

Devil Fruit Appearance: The Shiro Shiro no Mi resembles a dragon fruit with rectangular swirls, making it resemble brick.
Devil Fruit Description: The Shiro Shiro no Mi is a Paramecia-type Devil Fruit that allows the user to become a living fortress, making the user a Castle Human. The design of the fortress can be designed by the user, manifesting traits like tank treads, cannons, and gun turrets. The user can also store things inside of them, including a large number of people. The user also has full control of what happens inside of their fortress, such as redesigning it at will even if there are people inside of them. The fortress can be broken out of by jumping out any windows, hatches, exits or simply breaking the fortress open. Damaging the inside of the fortress damages the user proportional to the damage done to the infrastructure.

Fighting Style: The Strongest Dreadnought
Weapon Utilization: Marissa utilizes her weaponry along with her devil fruit, storing them inside her body when not in use.
Description: Marissa uses the Shiro Shiro no Mi to become a humanoid battleship-shaped fortress, or to use the weapons of said fortress in her human form, combining her weapons with the style to make it less reliant on her devil fruit alone.




Toggled Abilities:




Passive Abilities:




Haki:





Techniques
(The following techniques can either be all devil fruit techniques, or a combination of devil fruit, and natural/weapon techniques)



[ Ahhh, looks like your fighting style was created before the big combat update. Hence there is no point in me grading anything below. Please update all techniques to use the new template and combat system. ]

Light Techniques:

Medium Techniques:

Heavy Techniques:

AoE Techniques:



Francis
Francis
The Golden Ogre of Tequila Wolf
[tracker=/t1376-francis-charlemagne#7655]
Name : Francis Charlemagne
Epithet : "The Golden Ogre of Tequila Wolf"
Age : 28
Height : 6'1" (186 cm)
Weight : 198 lbs (90 kg)
Species/Tribe : Human
Faction : Marines
World Position : Rear Admiral
Crew : 69th Battalion
Ship : SSS Méricour
Marine Rank : Rear Admiral
Crew Role : Fleet Commander
Income Bonus : +0.10
Balance : [bel] 120,050,000
[[baneoftheweak]][[freakofnature]][[childofdestiny]]
[[improviseadaptovercome]]
Posts : 106

Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought Empty Re: Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought

This post has in-line assessment comments.Mon Feb 10, 2020 6:43 pm
[ Comments in red. Be sure to expand all spoilers this time to check for comments.]

Marissa Galloway wrote:

Shiro Shiro no Mi


Devil Fruit: Shiro Shiro no Mi
Devil Fruit Type: Paramecia

Devil Fruit Appearance: The Shiro Shiro no Mi resembles a dragon fruit with rectangular swirls, making it resemble brick.
Devil Fruit Description: The Shiro Shiro no Mi is a Paramecia-type Devil Fruit that allows the user to become a living fortress, making the user a Castle Human. The design of the fortress can be designed by the user, manifesting traits like tank treads, cannons, and gun turrets. The user can also store things inside of them, including a large number of people. The user also has full control of what happens inside of their fortress, such as redesigning it at will even if there are people inside of them. The fortress can be broken out of by jumping out any windows, hatches, exits or simply breaking the fortress open. Damaging the inside of the fortress damages the user proportional to the damage done to the infrastructure.

Fighting Style: The Strongest Dreadnought
Weapon Utilization: Marissa utilizes her weaponry along with her devil fruit, storing them inside her body when not in use.
Description: Marissa uses the Shiro Shiro no Mi to become a humanoid battleship-shaped fortress, or to use the weapons of said fortress in her human form, combining her weapons with the style to make it less reliant on her devil fruit alone.




Toggled Abilities:




Passive Abilities:




Haki:





Techniques
(The following techniques can either be all devil fruit techniques, or a combination of devil fruit, and natural/weapon techniques)



Light Techniques:

Medium Techniques:

Heavy Techniques:

AoE Techniques:



Francis
Francis
The Golden Ogre of Tequila Wolf
[tracker=/t1376-francis-charlemagne#7655]
Name : Francis Charlemagne
Epithet : "The Golden Ogre of Tequila Wolf"
Age : 28
Height : 6'1" (186 cm)
Weight : 198 lbs (90 kg)
Species/Tribe : Human
Faction : Marines
World Position : Rear Admiral
Crew : 69th Battalion
Ship : SSS Méricour
Marine Rank : Rear Admiral
Crew Role : Fleet Commander
Income Bonus : +0.10
Balance : [bel] 120,050,000
[[baneoftheweak]][[freakofnature]][[childofdestiny]]
[[improviseadaptovercome]]
Posts : 106

Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought Empty Re: Shiro Shiro no Mi: The Strongest Dreadnought

This post has in-line assessment comments.Tue Feb 11, 2020 11:24 pm
Approved!


Marissa Galloway wrote:

Shiro Shiro no Mi


Devil Fruit: Shiro Shiro no Mi
Devil Fruit Type: Paramecia

Devil Fruit Appearance: The Shiro Shiro no Mi resembles a dragon fruit with rectangular swirls, making it resemble brick.
Devil Fruit Description: The Shiro Shiro no Mi is a Paramecia-type Devil Fruit that allows the user to become a living fortress, making the user a Castle Human. The design of the fortress can be designed by the user, manifesting traits like tank treads, cannons, and gun turrets. The user can also store things inside of them, including a large number of people. The user also has full control of what happens inside of their fortress, such as redesigning it at will even if there are people inside of them. The fortress can be broken out of by jumping out any windows, hatches, exits or simply breaking the fortress open. Damaging the inside of the fortress damages the user proportional to the damage done to the infrastructure.

Fighting Style: The Strongest Dreadnought
Weapon Utilization: Marissa utilizes her weaponry along with her devil fruit, storing them inside her body when not in use.
Description: Marissa uses the Shiro Shiro no Mi to become a humanoid battleship-shaped fortress, or to use the weapons of said fortress in her human form, combining her weapons with the style to make it less reliant on her devil fruit alone.




Toggled Abilities:




Passive Abilities:




Haki:





Techniques
(The following techniques can either be all devil fruit techniques, or a combination of devil fruit, and natural/weapon techniques)



Light Techniques:

Medium Techniques:

Heavy Techniques:

AoE Techniques:



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