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Anonymous
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Chain Chain Style ! Empty Chain Chain Style !

This post has in-line assessment comments.Mon Apr 10, 2017 1:16 pm

Chain Style


Fighting Style: Chain Style
Weapon Utilization: Chain
Specialization: Mixture Of Both
Description: Carrying a specialized steel metal large chain that's 100m length and 500lb in weight. The chain can be used as a binding or slashing style of fighting. The chain can even form spikes all around itself when called for and these metal spikes are 5 inches in length.


Techniques


(The following techniques can either be all devil fruit techniques, or a combination of devil fruit, and natural/weapon techniques)

Light Attacks:

Medium Attacks:

Heavy Attacks:

AOE Attacks:


[/b]







Last edited by Yurei Yagami on Mon Apr 10, 2017 9:18 pm; edited 13 times in total
Gray
Gray
The Conqueror / Black Fist
[tracker=/t131-tracker-gray-starks#504]
Name : Gray
Epithet : "The Conqueror"; "Black Fist"
Age : 49
Height : 10'2" (310 cm)
Weight : 1043 lbs (473 kg)
Species/Tribe : Cyborg Human
Faction : Pirate
World Position : Lurking Legend (Former Yonkou)
Crew : Black Fist Pirates (Destroyed)
Ship : Sangria's Vane (Destroyed)
Crew Role : Captain (Former)
Devil Fruit : Pressure-Pressure Fruit
Bounty : [ber=r] 5,000,000,000
EXP Bonus : +0.20 (to all allies)
Income Bonus : +0.20
Shop Discount : -30%
Balance : [bel] 25,000,000,000
[[strollingdeath]][[baneoftheweak]][[riseandshine]][[childofdestiny]][[freakofnature]]
[[punchoutguru]][[dulcetvirtuoso]]

[[improviseadaptovercome]]
Posts : 3991

Chain Chain Style ! Empty Re: Chain Chain Style !

This post has in-line assessment comments.Mon Apr 10, 2017 5:37 pm
[Comments are in orange.]

Yurei Yagami wrote:

Chain Style


Fighting Style: Chain Style
Weapon Utilization: Chain
Specialization: Mixture Of Both
Description: Carrying a specialized steel metal large chain that's 10ft in length and 200lbs in weight. The chain can be used as a binding or slashing style of fighting. The chain can even form spikes all around itself when called for and these metal spikes are 5 inches in length.[Keep in mind that with this weapon, it will not make sense for you to bind anyone more than 10 feet away from you. Also, any slashes sent farther than 10 feet from you will become flying slashes.]


Techniques


(The following techniques can either be all devil fruit techniques, or a combination of devil fruit, and natural/weapon techniques)

Light Attacks:

Medium Attacks:

Heavy Attacks:

AOE Attacks:





Anonymous
Guest
Guest

Chain Chain Style ! Empty Re: Chain Chain Style !

This post has in-line assessment comments.Mon Apr 10, 2017 7:43 pm
Bumped and ready for checking
Gray
Gray
The Conqueror / Black Fist
[tracker=/t131-tracker-gray-starks#504]
Name : Gray
Epithet : "The Conqueror"; "Black Fist"
Age : 49
Height : 10'2" (310 cm)
Weight : 1043 lbs (473 kg)
Species/Tribe : Cyborg Human
Faction : Pirate
World Position : Lurking Legend (Former Yonkou)
Crew : Black Fist Pirates (Destroyed)
Ship : Sangria's Vane (Destroyed)
Crew Role : Captain (Former)
Devil Fruit : Pressure-Pressure Fruit
Bounty : [ber=r] 5,000,000,000
EXP Bonus : +0.20 (to all allies)
Income Bonus : +0.20
Shop Discount : -30%
Balance : [bel] 25,000,000,000
[[strollingdeath]][[baneoftheweak]][[riseandshine]][[childofdestiny]][[freakofnature]]
[[punchoutguru]][[dulcetvirtuoso]]

[[improviseadaptovercome]]
Posts : 3991

Chain Chain Style ! Empty Re: Chain Chain Style !

This post has in-line assessment comments.Mon Apr 10, 2017 8:27 pm
Firstly, you may want to fix your formatting. You might be missing a bold closing tag somewhere.

For your second light technique, the level should 1, not 5.

For your third light technique, reduce the buff and debuff to 25% and increase the cooldown to 12 posts.

The reason why your light technique cooldowns are turning out so high is because you keep trying to give stat buffs and debuffs to them. You don't need to have stat buffs and debuffs for each technique. Those are optional. Damage dealing techniques don't require buffs/debuffs. Sorry if the template was not clear about that.

Even with that knowledge, if you choose to keep the stat buffs and debuffs for the rest of the techniques, apply the following additional corrections plus the light technique corrections mentioned above:

Make the cooldown of both medium attacks 7.

Increase the cooldown of the first heavy technique to 8.


Anonymous
Guest
Guest

Chain Chain Style ! Empty Re: Chain Chain Style !

This post has in-line assessment comments.Mon Apr 10, 2017 9:08 pm
Bumped
Gray
Gray
The Conqueror / Black Fist
[tracker=/t131-tracker-gray-starks#504]
Name : Gray
Epithet : "The Conqueror"; "Black Fist"
Age : 49
Height : 10'2" (310 cm)
Weight : 1043 lbs (473 kg)
Species/Tribe : Cyborg Human
Faction : Pirate
World Position : Lurking Legend (Former Yonkou)
Crew : Black Fist Pirates (Destroyed)
Ship : Sangria's Vane (Destroyed)
Crew Role : Captain (Former)
Devil Fruit : Pressure-Pressure Fruit
Bounty : [ber=r] 5,000,000,000
EXP Bonus : +0.20 (to all allies)
Income Bonus : +0.20
Shop Discount : -30%
Balance : [bel] 25,000,000,000
[[strollingdeath]][[baneoftheweak]][[riseandshine]][[childofdestiny]][[freakofnature]]
[[punchoutguru]][[dulcetvirtuoso]]

[[improviseadaptovercome]]
Posts : 3991

Chain Chain Style ! Empty Re: Chain Chain Style !

This post has in-line assessment comments.Mon Apr 10, 2017 9:09 pm
Proofread the formatting before bumping. xD Your formatting is still messed up. (I personally don't care either way but you're the one who's going to have to keep looking at it and cursing yourself once it's locked.)
Gray
Gray
The Conqueror / Black Fist
[tracker=/t131-tracker-gray-starks#504]
Name : Gray
Epithet : "The Conqueror"; "Black Fist"
Age : 49
Height : 10'2" (310 cm)
Weight : 1043 lbs (473 kg)
Species/Tribe : Cyborg Human
Faction : Pirate
World Position : Lurking Legend (Former Yonkou)
Crew : Black Fist Pirates (Destroyed)
Ship : Sangria's Vane (Destroyed)
Crew Role : Captain (Former)
Devil Fruit : Pressure-Pressure Fruit
Bounty : [ber=r] 5,000,000,000
EXP Bonus : +0.20 (to all allies)
Income Bonus : +0.20
Shop Discount : -30%
Balance : [bel] 25,000,000,000
[[strollingdeath]][[baneoftheweak]][[riseandshine]][[childofdestiny]][[freakofnature]]
[[punchoutguru]][[dulcetvirtuoso]]

[[improviseadaptovercome]]
Posts : 3991

Chain Chain Style ! Empty Re: Chain Chain Style !

This post has in-line assessment comments.Mon Apr 10, 2017 9:19 pm
Chain Chain Style ! Fdzj9w
Yurei Yagami wrote:

Chain Style


Fighting Style: Chain Style
Weapon Utilization: Chain
Specialization: Mixture Of Both
Description: Carrying a specialized steel metal large chain that's 100m length and 500lb in weight. The chain can be used as a binding or slashing style of fighting. The chain can even form spikes all around itself when called for and these metal spikes are 5 inches in length.


Techniques


(The following techniques can either be all devil fruit techniques, or a combination of devil fruit, and natural/weapon techniques)

Light Attacks:

Medium Attacks:

Heavy Attacks:

AOE Attacks:


[/b]





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