[Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Mon Jul 24, 2023 11:57 am

Part 1: https://www.revivaldawn.com/t2436-arc-rubeck-island-conquest-part-1-big-trouble-in-pebble-beach

Rubeck, a dark, dreary island that no one with any importance ever thought twice about save for its thick fog and dangerous coastline. Perfect for a seedy criminal element to grow unchecked. An island that would one day be known as the birth of one of the world's great criminal organizations.

Right now the gangs of Pebble Beach have united and are currently on their way to ask for help from a powerful would be allu. Located deep in the mountain, he is known to frequent the hot spring pools in the snow capped peaks. Known only as the mysterious mountain boss!

Meanwhile, Hina and Dax are following the gangs into the mountains! But they will have to make it through the dangerous environment to do it.

Moletown is preparing for all out war and have recruited a powerful friend who's only out to save his own neck. But there's a mystery going on in shanty town that could determine the fate of the entire island! It will be up to a certain Doctor to save the day in Moletown once again.

As night fell over the little island nestled in the frigid dark waters of the North Blue, a dark cloud began to lurk in. A cold rain descended from the heavens, light at first but that did not last long. The rotating beam of light from the tower barely visible as it made its trip around and back.

A pair wandered through the downpour and deep into the wooded wetlands behind Pebble Beach.

"Really coming the fuck down.." Dax mumbled as he peeked out from under his golden umbrella. "Oi! Ain't you cold?" He shouted to the girl marching ahead of him.

"No way!" Hina called back, her pace was purposeful, a woman on a mission. No way a little freezing rain was gonna stop her. "I've spent my whole life here, this ain't nothin!"

"Fuckin people..." He mumbled, doing his best to keep up.

His eyes wandered upwards, most of the rain now blocked by the thick of the tree tops meeting each other. Then back down to the soft, squishy mud amongst the pools of dark water.

"Ya gotta be careful around here!" Her words accompanied by the muffled round of rain from above and the light splashing below. "There's a really nasty fish skulking about.." Her eyes carefully studying her next step, careful not to spend to long knee deep in the grasping mud.

"A fuckin fish?" Dax scoffed as he held out his hand, several gold pieces now rotating around each other. "You are high you think I'm walking in that." The gold pieces now intercepting his foot with every step, keeping him a foot away from the muddy water.

"Now that's a neat trick. I've seen you do some pretty crazy stuff, you must be one of those fruity guys I've heard so much about."

"What gave it away..? And no, we aren't fruity guys. We are fruit users. Big fuckin difference I can promise ya that."

"Yeah, yeah, I know a guy who's got fruity powers. His aren't like yours though."

"They aren't fruity pow...?! What the hell is that?!" A massive fish with a murderous mouth launched itself out of the muddy waters and knocked Dax from his golden pedestal, tumbling down into the mud.

"That's it! The fish I told you about! It's a Bananawani Gar."

"This ain't no fuckin fish... It’s got jaws like a damn lion..!" Dax grunted as he used his golden hands to keep the animal jaws from crushing him. "Ahhh...Fuck…! Ahh.." His panting accompanied by an audible crack and a sudden silence. The Gar now floating motionless as Dax was covered head to toe in the black mud.

"Not a fuckin word, ya hear...?"

"Hehehehe, of course not!"

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Mon Aug 07, 2023 1:55 pm

Long shadows stretched across the streets of Loguetown. A sharp-dressed rat scurried beneath the moonless sky. He was finally back home. After all these years, he had found his courage at last. His steps quickened, carrying him faster and faster towards a familiar building, a tavern in the distance. In his haste, he never wasted a thought on questions such as when and how he had gotten here. Only one thing mattered now.

_{“Help... me...”}

A weak voice drifted from the tavern. Richard burst through the door into a bleak, dusty mess. Broken tables, fallen chairs and shards of glass littered the floor. A disheveled woman leaned against the counter. Her fiery red hair cascaded down her shoulders like a flaming waterfall. Drip drop, countless tears painted the pale cheeks.

The rat’s heart lurched, threatening to sink into his stomach. “J-jana... My love... I... I am so sorry. P-please forgive me...” He dropped his suitcase and staggered closer. As the apologies ran dry, the excuses began to flow. “B-but I had to do it, see. They framed me, took away my medical license. We would’ve lost everything. The clinic, the bar, everything! I had no choice!” He pleaded with honesty he should’ve used years ago, before any of this had happened.

“Help me...”

Hearing the wavering voice broke the old doctor’s heart. He shambled closer, carefully cupping his former wife’s hands in his grasp. “Yes, I will. Please, let me help. I’ll do anything. I have connections now. Money, food, medicine, anything you need, any...” His breath hitched and blood ran cold, as the weeping specter reared its head.

That was not Jana.

“HELPME!!!”

A piercing screech shot through Richard’s skull. He jolted awake, springing up from his tangled bedsheets like a jack-in-the-box. Icy sweat dripped from his features and crawled down his back. He wiped his face with a shiver. “A nightmare... Just a nightmare...” The quietly muttered mantra failed to make him feel any better.

The rat scanned his dim surroundings with weary eyes. Darkness was an old friend, giving substance to the murky shapes. He was still in the same, shabby guest room he had fallen asleep in last night. Still trapped in Moletown... His fumbling hands eventually found his watch. Barely four in the morning... Much too early to get up, yet a little too late to get much sleep. Now wasn’t that just swell? He flopped over and tugged at his blanket.

For the next few hours, sleep toyed with the poor man. It promised a restful slumber, but refused to commit. Shadows danced at the edges of his vision, never quite encompassing him. In the background, the pitter patter of the rain played with his imagination.

And that scream still echoed in his ears...

Eventually, the morning deigned to show mercy. Perhaps the sun was somewhere out there, behind the curtain of clouds. Life began to flow through Moletown once again. The tired rat staggered down the stairs into the bar, feeling and looking like crap. His half-lidded eyes swept across the room, finally stopping onto a familiar face beckoning him to take a seat at their usual booth.

Reluctantly, the entrepreneur took a seat opposite of his business partner. He raised a brow, however, when there was no immediate invasion of personal space. That was either a good sign... Or a very, very bad one.

The octopus woman seemed lost in thought. She turned an unlit cigarette between her fingers idly. “So, Richie... Remember how you asked about weird deaths and bite marks yesterday?” Her conversational tone was a poor match for the grim topic. Savvy folks could guess it was probably intentional. She did love her little games.

“Y-yes... Did something happen?”

Venoronica stopped playing with the cigarette and placed it between her lips. “Yeah, one of the waitresses got whacked last night. Found her corpse in the back alley.” A politely offered lighter sparked a couple of times, before a flame took hold. She let out a wispy breath. “The weird thing is, what’s left of her was riddled with bite marks. That sick fuck ate her.” If she was rattled, she didn’t show it. The Contraband Queen did not get rattled.

Richard, meanwhile, would gladly get rattled on her behalf. Yesterday’s rumors ran through his head like a sped-up snail recording. It ended with the piercing scream that was starting to sound all too real by now. He was a little upset that he didn’t feel worse, actually. There was no pity towards the dead girl. When had he gotten so desensitized that he no longer got sick in the stomach hearing something like this?

Meanwhile, the mermaid blew out a ring and shrugged. “Oh well. You win some, you lose some.” Her comment was met with mild disbelief. “Waitresses...?” She barely even dignified it with an answer. “Sure. Weaklings die. Big deal. That’s the Moletown way, darling.” Another smoky ring drifted into the first one, scrambling both.

The cold woman shook her head. “I’m only annoyed because it was my property that got offed this time and right in my backyard too... Whoever did this is either crazy or pretty fucking stupid...” She regained her smile a little too easily for the rat’s liking. “But that business can wait for a little longer. Now, let’s get some breakfast. I’m starving~” And there came the tentacle, creeping into his personal space again.

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Mon Aug 07, 2023 3:34 pm

Night before the Assualt | Rubeck Mountains | Base of the Mole Hill

"Holy smokes, this mountain is huge!" Shohei exclaimed with childlike innocence. Stating a fact that would be obvious to anyone with eyes as Mole Hill was the tallest in the range.

"Kishishishishi.... N-Not to m-mention.. c-cold..!" Ichiro chattered back, the cold wind biting his slender frame to the bone.

"Yeah, would have been nice if we had a chance to stop and get coats... Oh, wait. We did." Koji mumbled sarcastically, leering at Ichiro.

"Will you guys shut it!" Kazu barked back. "Im thinkin ova here!" Mumbling as he tried to make heads or tails of the map in his hands.

"Well that's first.."

"Shove it, Koji!" The delinquent barked again. "Why don't you fucks make yourselves useful and keep an eye out for a shack.."

"A shack?"

"Yeah, Sho, a shack. Ya know, a wood building with four walls, a roof, and a door. One of those, yeah?" Koji quipped.

"Kishishishi.. you t-think.. they'll h-have h-heat..."

"Oooohhhh myyyy, god.. Will you guys just shut up for like two sec-...?!"

"HEY!" Sho shouted from a distance.

"S-Sho?! How the hell did you get over there?!"

"I think I found that shack you guys were looking for!" Sho pointed off into the distance, a shack with a smoke stack could be seen nestled in a bed of fresh snow.

Pebble Beach

"Lets go!" Nise shouted amongst the scrambling civilians, "Why we have a break from the rain let's get to it!"

The people of Pebble Beach came from every direction carrying wood, metal, and nails. Frantically readying their defenses for the impending invasion. The clanging sound of metal on metal rang out through the air as homes were boarded and roads were blocked.

Muddied footprints littered the ground, every pass making it harder and harder to move gracefully. Children ran supplies from one side of town to the other, while women readied fires and gathered up all the medical supplies in town.

"Oi! Nise!" A man shouted out.

"Yes, what is it?" The knockoff king responded, stroking his long beard.

"Some of the men have been asking, and, well..-"

"Let them know they are in safe hands, yes?" The tone projected confidence, "I, the man once hailed as Nise the Tactician shall guide our small town through this dark hour. A title I more than earned at the great battle of Goat Town far off in the East Blue during my time with the Navy.. Hmm.. Yes. It was a great battle indeed!"

"A battle where I single-handily fought off a horde of-....?

"No, no, no.... Sir, that's not what. No. The men are asking where Boss Okuma is?"

"Boss Okuma, you say..?"

"Yeah, frankly, we are scared shitless right now and you aren't exactly the man people believe in. Ya know?"

"Whaaa..?! What do you mean?! Did you not just hear me?! I was once known as Nise the Navigator! Hero of Briss!"

"Thought it was Nise the Undefeated, hero of the Kano Kingdom. The legendary champion who single handily saved the emperor's daughter" A passerby spoke up.

"I heard it was The Great Builder Nise, the man who made Water Seven float." Another chuckled.

"T-They are all true, y-you could say.. You could say that I am a man of many names!"

"Right. Sure. Point is, we would all feel a heck of a lot better if we knew where the Boss went."

"W-well... ya see, the thing is...." Nise chuckled nervously.

The Foggy Boggy | Rubeck Wetlands

Okuma and his pair of loyal men marched through the Foggy Boggy, a strange, almost supernatural quagmire found between Pebble Beach and Moletown.

Unlike the rest of the island, it was warm, an effect caused by underground hot springs heating the muddied wetlands above. Which, when the rising heat comes into contact with the cool surface air, creates a layer of fog so thick you could barely see what was in front of you. And, unlike the fog that came and went over the rest of this island, this patch never quite seemed to disappear.

It is widely avoided by locals due to the thick fog, dangerous terrain, and cast of predators that account for dozens of missing persons a year. This has led to it becoming a subject of ghost stories and sailor folklore for as long as anyone can remember.

"Kawkawkawkaw.. Just like old times, eh?" The crow cackled as he trailed behind Okuma and Momoiro.

"Old times? Since when is walking around this creepy shithole apart of those shitty old times!?"

"Kawkawkaw. Oh, I had forgotten how superstitious you are. KawKaw"

"I ain't superstitious ya shitty bird, its just, this shitty place man, it gives me the creeps, ya dig shitface?!"

"Wooooooo... So spooky, big scary, look at me I am scared little shit. That's you! Kawkawkawkaw!"

"Look here ya shit..!"

"Hmph.." Okuma grunted, interrupting the pair, "This is why I said I would handle this myself.."

"Speaking of that shit, you got some kind of shitty plan for when we get there?"

"Yes." The bear grunted. "I do."

Momoiro waited out the silence for a moment before responding.

"Well, are ya gonna tell us this shitty plan or what?!"

"No."

"Kawkawkawkawkaw!"

"Will you shut your shitty beak, ya scarecrow shit before I shut it for ya!?"

"Kawkaw! I'd like to see you try, shit boy!"

"Will you two just...-?!"

A blood-curdling scream pierced through the silence of the swamp, freezing the trio in their tracks.

"What the shit was that?!"

WC 895/12,991/13,500

Tue Aug 08, 2023 6:50 am

Empty plates and glasses chimed softly as tender hands carried them away. The octopus woman lounged lazily in her seat, picking her sharp teeth with a fish bone. “Ahhh... Much better. Can’t plan on an empty stomach.” She mused.

Coiling tentacles brushed gently against the legs beneath the table. The venomous mermaid leaned closer, locking eyes with her dear pawn. “Now, about that murder business... I’ve got my hands full with the war preparations. So, I want you to find out whodunnit. You have a nose for this stuff.” She underlined her plea with a playful poke against the man’s sharp nose. “Won’t you help me, Richie~?”

Richard flinched at the words. Like a red-hot brand, they burned a mark against his mind. He averted his eyes. “Er, well, you know I can say ‘no’ to you...” He wasn’t talking in a figurative sense here. Even if he ignored the mesmerizing way this woman could bat her eyelashes, he couldn’t ignore the powerful tentacle clutching his ankle like a ball and chain.

Venoronica clasped her hands together with a light laugh. “Hmhmhm~ Always the charmer~” She flashed a knowing smile. “I’ll send Bob with you. He can make sure you don’t get lost.” A tentacle rose to beckon the burly barkeep closer. “Oh, Bob~! Be a darling and help Richie here with whatever he needs.” Her orders were met with an affirming grunt.

...Though the man didn’t look thrilled about it.

Taking any excuse to slip away, the rat squirmed free from the predator’s grasp. “I-I’ll get right on that. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’d like to take a look at the victim, the crime scene and so forth.” His desperate retreat sparked an amused hum. “My, playing a real detective, are you?” The comment made him squirm more. “Oh, nothing of the sort. It’s simply... professional curiosity. Worked as a coroner for the marines for a while, see.” He lied.

In reality, the shady doctor’s motivations were rooted purely in self-preservation. He was no stranger to gruesome injuries. You saw all manner of ghastly things in the aftermath of pirate battles. Like with most lethal ailments, if he could deduce the cause of death, he could try to devise a cure. Or avoid the problem altogether.

The unwilling pawn scrambled onto his feet. He took half a step towards the exit, when he ran into the bartender. The man moved fast for someone so big... An empathetic arm wrapped around the pawn’s shoulders and guided him towards the backdoor.

After the doctor-turned-detective had left, the Queen’s towering enforcer lumbered closer. Clearly he had been waiting for his chance. “Queen, we’ve got a problem.” He slipped her a bounty poster, a song and dance familiar to them both.

Mind-numbingly familiar, actually.

The long-suffering leader made a show of rolling her eyes and heaving her shoulders. “Ugh... Would it kill you to bring some good news for a change? A treasure map, maybe?” However, the act slipped when her gaze wandered onto the picture. “Hm...?” She studied the bounty, drinking in the details.

Taking the pause as an invitation, the enforcer elaborated. “The spies spotted him at Pebble Beach, getting real familiar with the locals. What should we do?” When the silence threatened to grow awkward, he carefully leaned closer. “Er, Queen...?” His eyes shifted between the leader and the poster. Honestly, he failed to see what was special about this one.

The Queen drifted back from her thoughts with a mysterious mutter. “Diamonds are a girl’s best friend... But I won’t say no to some gold~ Hmhmhm~” Humming to herself, she clicked her fingers. Several eyes turned to her, awaiting orders...

A short while later, at the fringes of Moletown...

“Look, Bob, I’m flattered by the escort, truly, but I know my way around. And I would never dream of trying to bail. The Queen and I have a deal, see. You can trust me. Would I lie to you?”

“Yes. Yes, you would. And the reason why nobody believes you is because you say shit like that.”

The great detective had tried and failed to shake his enormous assistant several times now. When he had inspected the body for the wounds and bite marks, the man had hovered over his shoulder. Snooping the crime scene for any peculiar footprints or dropped debris went the same way. And now they were here, drudging through rain and mud, following a trail that he had honestly just pulled out of his... Er, well, never mind.

Right now, the most crucial thing was finding a chance to slip away. The seasoned liar had managed to distract the lackey by spouting nonsense deductions about his findings. Oh yes, the teeth marks were made by a human, so that ruled out any animals. Then there were crumbs of bioluminescent mushrooms on the body and the crime scene. Of course, these particular mushrooms only grew in the darkest corners of Moletown caves. Gah, why couldn’t he have found fish scales and made an excuse to head for the port?!

Luckily, the bartender was still talking. “‘Sides, I want this shitheel caught as much as anyone. Tanya was a good gal. Smart, polite... Great rack.... This is personal.” He gestured at the looming, damp caverns ahead. “Now listen up, these caves are a damned maze if you don’t know the route. So don’t...” He turned around to find himself talking to empty air. “...wander off. Fuck.” His eyes dropped onto muddy footprints leading into one of the caves. He grunted.

The Queen was going to have his head if he let this guy slip away...

Meanwhile, the rat was bolting down a winding tunnel like his tail had been on fire. A wild echo bounced between the walls. He had no direction in mind aside from forward. Even the embrace of darkness was better than the embrace of that venomous menace. Now that he had managed to slip free, he could finally see light at the end of the tunnel.

Uh... In a strangely literal sense...

As the escapee arrived into a larger cavern, the fearful sprint devolved first into a staggering jog and then further into a wheezing stop. He scanned his surroundings warily. The air was thick like soup. Soft light painted shadows across the floor. Peculiar, glowing mushrooms lined the walls, drinking greedily from the plentiful moisture. The echo doubled every footstep. Tap tap... Tap tap... Tap tap... There was an odd bundle on the ground, resembling a pile of discarded clothes, or a bedroll, or... His breathing stopped and a single thought shot through his mind.

Why is that shadow moving?

-CHOMP-

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Fri Aug 18, 2023 9:28 am

Base of The Mole Hill | Largest Mountain on Rubeck

"Oi!" Kazu banged on the wooden door. "You there old man?!"

"Y-y...you think he went s-s-s-somewhere...."

"Just give 'em a minute, eh Ichiro?!" The pompadour delinquent barked. "Oi! Geezer! It's Kazu! Get the fuck out here, yeah?!" His fist slammed into the door harder and louder with every word. But only silence was received in return.

....

"Gee, great plan, boss." Koji sneered, "Old fart probably croaked."

"Shut it Koji. Oi! Will you hurry the fuck u...!!"

The door swung open, revealing a wrinkled little man sporting a large, caterpillar-like mustache.

"Oh..........Kazu........." His words were slow and soft as he hung onto every word. "It's........you......."

"Finally!" The delinquent and his gang brushed passed the man and into the home.

"Come.........on....................in........................"

The door swung shut behind the geezer as he shuffled in his pink slippers across the room at a snail's pace.

"So..........its.........that..................time........................again........"

"Oh my fucking god," Koji mumbled at the sloth-like man's inflection. "This is ridiculous."

"Gramps, we are gonna need a lift."

"Oh.................well...............that's....................fine..........."

Shuffling across the floor the Wharf rats watched, and waited, as the old man made his way to a door in the back of the shack.

"Seriously....?" Koji grumbled, "There's no better way to do this...?"

"Not unless you wanna climb the side of Mole Hill yourself? No? That's what I thought, so just shut yer trap, eh?"

Kazu glanced over at Ichiro who was happily warming himself by the fire. "Kishishishi... I'll pass on being outside. I hate it up here."

"Oi! Sho! Keep yer mitts to yourself, huh? This ain't our stuff to touch."

The little grandpa finally made it to the door, swinging it open with enough force to rock the knick-knacks on the wall, and with it a gust of dry hot air filled the room. "This.............way.............."

The door opened up to a vast labyrinth of caves that seemed to stretch endlessly.

"Kishishishishi! It's so warm!" Ichiro shouted gleefully.

"Wow...." A rare expression of anything other than sarcasm slipped out of Koji's mouth. Admiring the grandiose complexity of the tunnels.

"Pretty cool right?" Kazu smirked as came up behind the pair. "They run throughout the entire island, and Pops here is the only one who knows the way through em."

"This little geezer can remember all that?"

"Well...." Kazu paused, "You'll see." He snickered as the old man pulled out a large whistle from his robe. Something that he promptly blew into, the sharp pitch echoing endlessly throughout the labyrinth. Leaving the Wharf Rats with little to do aside from covering their ears to dull the sound.

This was followed by a brief moment of silence, a silence that was quickly shattered by a thunderous pitter-patter of four-legged galloping.

Out of the shadows, two large moles came to a squealing stop in front of the group. They were bigger than bears and wore hard hats on their heads.

"Woooooooaaaaahhhhh!!" Sho shouted, "I've never seen a Digger Mole before!"

"That's because not many are left." Kazu mumbled, "Those fucks over in Moletown hunted the hell out of em when they first got here. Good eatin, or so they say."

"Used to be this island was full of em, their the ones who dug out all this out after all."

The group climbed onto the backs of the Mole's, each one fitted with a saddle that allowed two riders to fit comfortably on each mole.

"Everything.........should..........be........ready.........to.........go........"

"Thanks old man!" The words echoed as the moles took off into the darkness, leaving only the lonely old man and his lantern.

"Be........careful......."

Northern most part of the Eastern Pines | Rubeck

"C'mon! Keep up!" Hina shouted as she jumped from rock to rock, avoiding the waters below as she crossed the river with ease.

"Holy shit..." Dax panted with his hands on his knees, his breath now visible due to the temperature change. "This bitch just doesn't stop..." Groaning as he did his best to keep pace with the young woman ahead of him.

The further north they traveled and closer to the mountains they got, the colder it became. The rain turned to snow and the green trees were now capped with white.

Hina stopped for a moment and turned back to her gold clad partner. "You know, you sure do complain a lot. Surprised the cold isn't bothering you too."

"Tch..." Dax snarled as the snow on the ground melted under every step. The Goldmonger using his powers to heat the gold he wore, maintaining not only his body temperature but also keeping his bare feet from submerging in the mounds of white.

"It aint the fuckin cold that's bothersome." He snapped back sarcastically.

"How much further we got to go?"

"See that?" Pointing out the Mole Hill looming in the distance. "Thats where we need to go."

"The fuck..?" Dax mumbled. "My ass sure as hell aint climbing all that bullshit."

"Hehehe. Don't worry, we wont be climbing the outside of it." She giggled, "We just gotta get to Gramp's house, that's all."

"Gramps..?"

"Dont worry, you'll see! Try and keep up wont ya? We gotta get there before Kazu does!" She shouted as she quickened her pace once again and disappeared into the trees.

"Fuck me...." The Goldmonger moaned.

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Fri Aug 18, 2023 9:29 am

Darkness swallowed the startled rat. ...Or tried to chew him up something fierce, at least. Slimy teeth gnashed far too close to his head. Robbed of light, he pushed against the mighty jaws and tried to desperately ignore the fear rising like bile up his throat. If the mere maw was this massive, he didn’t even want to think about how huge the beast itself had to be... Well, he did still think about it, but against his will.

With desperate strength, the criminal managed to lodge his legs against the roof of the mouth. No suitcase... Must’ve dropped it... His hands desperately fumbled through his pockets. Clothing rustled, glass chimed and his heart hammered. Bottles, poultices, vials... Why was it that you could never find what you were looking for whilst in a terrible hurry? Under any other circumstances, it would’ve made for a fascinating rese-

A knife!

Richard resisted the odd urge to hold the implement triumphantly above his head. He brought it down violently onto the fleshy pillow beneath him. The entire maw lurched mid-bite. A bestial howl of pain erupted from the depths of the pitch-black throat.

Approximately half a second later, the sharp-dressed ball of spit was ejected into the cave wall. Shaking his head, he scrambled to find his legs. One was stuck behind his head and the other was trying a solo career in yoga. He yanked himself upright -cursed as he probably sprained something- and brandished the blade against the beast with false bravado. In truth though, he was not at all ready to fight this fearsome...

...Llama?

The furry creature staring back turned out to be, well, still rather tall at nine feet or so, but certainly not the building-sized monster he expected. And a little more clothed too. Once the surprise wore off, the details started to register. A closer look revealed a pair of dark boots, ripped jeans and a positively garish, pink shirt. It was hanging open to show off the goods, of course. The wild, blonde pompadour was a strange clash against the otherwise gray fur. Numerous other fashion statements decorated the animal man’s body. Something about him seemed vaguely familiar...

Blood dripped like drool, as the Mink glared at the human. “Fffuck, man! You ftabbed my ftongh!” His long tongue lolled, as he tried and failed to assess the damage. “You’re an affhoe!” He spat indignantly, before reeling the injured tongue back into his mouth. Didn’t seem to slow him down all that much, actually.

Richard snapped back to reality, trying to find some words, any words really. “Uh, well, y-you tried to eat me. It was self-defense, see.” ...Wait, why was he getting sheepish over here? He had almost gotten eaten! And why did something about that Mink tug at a distant memory?

Before the puzzled doctor could voice his thoughts, the skittish Mink lifted his hooves in some vague approximation of a karate stance. “Back off, man! I bite!” All he managed in response was dry snark. “So I’ve noticed.” Stupid mouth, always working faster than his brain...

However, the llama man seemed too wrapped up in his anxiety to notice. “I knew you’d come for me. I’m warning you, I ain’t ‘fraid to kill a man.” He chopped the air and clicked his teeth for a good measure. “Who sent you? Loha? Firebear’d? Or are you a government schmuck? Fuck, I knew Cipher Poll assholes would come for me... Game over, man, game over...” He rattled off in some sort of delirium.

The doctor swept his gaze around. Numerous bite marks lined the cave walls, including the moss and the glowing mushrooms. What a peculiar jaw shape on this fellow, distinctly inhuman... Though more importantly... “Have... Have you been eating these mushrooms?” He asked pensively. If he wasn’t entirely mistaken, some of these were mildly toxic. Induced varying degrees of delirium and paranoia. The locals used them for... recreational purposes.

Perhaps that was the reason for the stranger’s state. “Fuck off, dude. It’s a free island. I get hungry when I’m nervous.” Or maybe he had some absurd drug tolerance and was just an inherently paranoid mess. You could never quite tell with these types.

“Not... even remotely my point, but I digress.”

Hold on...

That last line set off a line of dominoes inside the involuntary detective’s mind. ‘I bite... I ain’t ‘fraid to kill a man... I get hungry when I’m nervous...’ Those words swirled around his skull like ink sloshing in its bottle. The splatters painted patterns that started to look a little too familiar. Slowly, silently, his hand slipped between the lapels of his coat, reaching for his holster...

---

Meanwhile, back at the entrance to the underground labyrinth, Bob the temporary rat-sitter was not having a good day. He held a tiny snail upon a trembling palm, awkwardly reciting the story so far. “...and then he just, uh, ran off.” He swallowed nervously.

The snail smiled sweetly, relaying a venomously sultry voice. “Oh, I’m sorry, darling... The line is pretty bad. It almost sounded like you said that you let Richie get away~” Its half-lidded gaze narrowed expectantly, letting silence fill the line.

“...”

After what felt like a chilling eternity, the snail let out a breath sigh, sans the smoke. “...Right. Listen, since you’ve been a loyal, little puppy all these years, I’ll give you a chance.” The sweetness vanished from the voice, leaving only the venom. “You get one hour to un-fuck this situation, before I make you into an example. Do I make myself clear?” A rhetorical question.

Bob gulped down his fears, but they just kept bubbling. “Y-yes.” His answer was met with a squint. “Yes, what?” The voice demanded irritably. “Yes, Queen.” Click.

After the call ended, the bulbous man snuck the snail back into his pocket ever so carefully, like one wrong would set it off again. His eyes reluctantly focused on the maze ahead of him. With a deep breath, he briefly pictured what he would do that rat once he got his hands on him... Better start with the legs... Couldn’t run away with no legs. He licked his lips and marched into the darkness.

Words: 1023
Total: 12 050 / 13 500

Tue Sep 19, 2023 3:42 pm

Night before the Assault | Eastern Pines | Rubeck

The once torrential rains had gone, replaced by a salty fog that seemed to cling to the island with all its might. It rolled across the rocky coasts and into the dense branches of pine that covered the treacherous landscape of Rubeck.

"God damn.." Dax mumbled, "I can barely see wha-....!"

"FUCK...!" Clutching his head, he heated the gold on his hand to a glowing red, illuminating the tree that had just assaulted. "This place can suck a fuckin dick man..."

He glanced around the sea of white around him, "Oi...." He shouted, "Girl, where ya at...?" He paused for a response.

"YO..!...Ya there...?!"

Once again, the only response he received was the sound of rain falling from the trees.

"Well, shit..."

Foggy Boggy | Rubeck

"This shit eatin' fogs getting even thicker.." Momoiro muttered as his feet splashed in the puddles.

"Kawkawkaw.. still spooked eh..?" Karasu cackled.

"I'm telling ya, there plenty of reasons to be scared of this shitty place-..." A chorus of piercing howls echoed through the bog, causing him to trail off.

"See ya shit!? That right there, fuckin Sea Wolves..."

"Kawkawkaw! Scared of a few overgrown mutts?!"

"Overgrown mutts?! These ain't just any kind of shitty mongrel, eh?!" Momoiro snapped back.

"Do you two ever shut up." Okuma barked, "Sea Wolves stay to the coasts and edge of The Pines. Everyone knows that."

"Kawkawkaw! Scared for nothin, as usual. Kawkawkaw!"

"... The Gar though...." Okuma mumbled before Momoiro could respond. "Jaws like lions and invasive as hell..."

"One or two ain't so bad... But around here..? They are everywhere." By his tone, you thought he was telling a campfire horror.

A collective gulp could be heard as Karasu and Momoiro's eyes locked onto the murky waters that surrounded them.

"Now then, less yapping more walking."

Mole Tunnels | Inside of Mole Hill

The pitter-patter of the Giant Digger Mole's feet echoed through the vast labyrinth as it raced through the darkness, with only a tiny headlamp lighting the way.

"Woooooooooo!" Shohei shouted as he sat towards the front of the saddle. "This is so cool!!"

"So you two have had access to this the entire time, and never thought once to tell us...?"

"C'mon Koji.. It ain't like that." Chino pleaded, "We just had to keep it under wraps, ya dig? Couldn't let word get out this is how we get all over the island all secret-like."

"Right. Sure." Koji responded coldly, preferring to stare at the dancing shadows on the blurred wall as they rushed passed.

"Leave him." Kazu barked, "We got more important things to worry about than his moody ass."

"This is it boys... We get him on board and there ain't no way we can lose to those Moletown cucks."

"Oh yeah..! Last leg of the race! Kishishishishi!" Ichiro chirped.

"Hehe! I can't help but get all excited, this time tomorrow, we are finally gonna be free!" Chino smiled, "Been a long time comin! Jajajajajaja!"

WC 504/14,372/13,500

Sun Sep 24, 2023 1:16 pm

Paranoia was a poison worse than any other. Seeping into your mind, it corrupted your thoughts and rotted your reason. It had a habit of hampering judgment and slowing down every action by a crucial fraction of a second. In the worst cases, it blinded you to everything around you. Or right behind you...

With slow, shaky steps, Richard backed away, until a wall bumped against his back. His constricted pupils focused like crosshairs on the llama man in front of him. Gunmetal gleamed in his grasp. He leveled the shaky barrel... And felt a massive hand grip his shoulder.

...This wasn’t a wall.

Heavy breathing bore down on the rat in warm waves. It stank foul. Drool dripped like thin rain. His arm moved before his mind. ...Only to be intercepted by another meaty hand grasping his wrist. A gunshot pinged against the cave ceiling.

Bob did not appreciate almost getting shot. Not one bit. His beady eyes measured the sharp-dressed traitor. “Hey, you’re right-handed, right...?” He didn’t even wait for an answer, before squeezing the wrist. Hard. Bone cracked and the rat squealed. There, now he had one less thing to worry about. And folks said his slow demeanor made him shit at problem-solving. No, sir.

Next, the hungry glare found the furry creature. Compared to the towering bartender, the tall llama might as well have been a regular-sized llama. The two stared at each other with clear distrust. It was a powder keg waiting for a spark.

The hungry enforcer hoisted the rat up by the broken arm. Looking at the dangling legs, he licked lips. A little lanky for his tastes... He liked some meat on the bones... But this would do. His jaw stretched. There was a sickening crunch. Blood dripped like barbeque sauce.

Richard’s scream got stuck in his throat. Only wheezed air managed to slip past. The pain was like a needle, injecting adrenaline into his skull. He didn’t need a medical degree to recognize the sensation of a horrifyingly botched amputation. His right leg was missing a lot, including a chunk of the knee and some critical parts of a major artery. The crimson sauce kept flowing...

Everything had happened so fast that even the motormouth Mink caught up only now. He retched in horror. “Yooo...! What the fuck, man?!” Green coloration painted his features. Swallowing the bile rising up his throat, he aimed an accusing finger at the monster. “The fuck is wrong with you?! You with the Queen?!” Despite putting up a brave front, he was slowly inching backwards.

Bob really didn’t have patience for this nonsense. He wiped his mouth and shrugged. “Yeahhh, it’s a long story...” Much to his surprise, however, the claim was shot down immediately.

The llama mink was a number of things. Nervous, paranoid, high as a kite... But he wasn’t stupid. He could put the two and two together. “It really ain’t! You work for the Queen and you’re fucking crazy. End of story.” His mouth expanded to an impossible size and took a massive bite out of the cavern wall, stone and mushrooms alike.

Somewhere in the depths of the pain cocktail that was Richard’s mind, the pieces of the puzzle rearranged. He stared at the enormous bite mark with glassy eyes. Elongated jaw, long spaces between the teeth... It was a peculiar, animalistic shape. Memories of the consumed corpse flashed before his eyes. The ink splatters from earlier took new meanings.

Then it hit him.

Slowly, the doctor craned his head downwards, just enough to assess the stump. Bite marks... Distinctly human bite marks... The cold caress of blood loss was nothing next to the icy realization trailing down his spine.

“...It was you.”

Suddenly, the mink snorted like he was hawking up a loogie and... Spat a wad of wet debris. It struck the boulder of a bartender right in the face. However, he didn’t even stagger. Instead, there was a series of chomps and soon the whole clump vanished down his throat. ...Exactly as planned.

Wearing a wicked grin, the llama pumped his fist. “Fuckin’ knew it! I knew you’d eat it! You’re a nervous eater, just like me!” The declaration received a puzzled stare. “And...?” It only served to fuel the victorious fervor. “And I hope you packed your bags, buddy... ‘Cuz you’re going on a ^T~_R~^I~_P...”

Bob wasn’t sure why that last word had such a weird echo. Or why his legs were trying to go their separate ways. All he knew was that the cavern walls looked nice in all those pretty colors. Even the gun barrel poking between his eyes looked beautiful in its rainbow glory.

Then, a single gunshot painted everything black.

Richard dropped to the ground and collapsed. His heart was hammering a million beats a second. The smoking gun clattered free from his left hand, as he feverishly rummaged through his pockets. A green vial was injected into his hide. Soothing sensations seeped through his battered body. All he had to do was breathe and not get killed in the next couple of...

A distinctly llama shaped shadow stopped over the downed crook. He was chewing up debris like bubblegum. “So... You wanna explain what the hell is going on, dude? Cuz I’m freaking the fuck out!” ...Well, at least the two strangers finally had something in common.

Words: 893
Total: 12 943 / 13 500

Thu Nov 30, 2023 10:31 pm

Foggy Boggy | Rubeck

"You've heard the one about a bear, a bird, and a tracksuit wander into a haunted swamp to their impending doom, yeah?"

"There it is again.." Okuma mumbled as the shrill scream pierced through the dense fog once again.

"It's almost like..."

"The shit is that man?!" Momoiro shouted, digging into his ear to alleviate the high pitch.

"Hush!" Okuma barked, closing his eyes he listened closely to the sound.

Help.

Making out the word the demon barber split the fog with his speed, creating a path for his men to follow.

HELP

Okuma burst from the fog into a clearing, a small green field hidden in the trees. In the center sat a stone with a large bird perched atop.

"You..Gotta let us.... know.." Momoiro gasped for air as he emerged from the fog.

"That bird..." Karasu's normally thin eyes opened wide at the sight.

"Ready yourselves."

HELP!

The bird screeched at the top of its lungs, its call mimicking the sound of a human woman crying for help.

The trio gripped their weapons as the droplets of rain seemed to freeze in time. Holding their place until a hail of arrows fell from the sky to accompany them along their gravity-fueled journey to Earth.

"Kawkawkaw.. Old times indeed!" Karasu snickered as his blade cut the very air itself. A single swipe from the straw-thin blade reduced the volley of arrows to mere splinters.

"You shits are gonna have to do better than that, yeah?! If even this shitty bird can stop ya, you ain't standing a chance with the boss!" Momoiro shouted, brandishing his blade arrogantly.

The trees rustled as dozens of shadows darted out of them and into the open. An ominous breeze blew as the figures came into focus.

"No fucking way.."

"Kawkawkawkaw! You've got to be kidding me..!"

Mole Hill | Rubeck

Dax stood at the base of the mountain known as the Mole Hill, his eyes fixed on the massive peak that stretched to the heavens.

"Yeaaaa.... Fuck this.. Chicks gone anyway. Ain't nothing I can do about that, yea?" He tried to rationalize the decision to give up as his mind drifted back to the girl's massive bear of a father.

"Oi." The bear mumbled as he chowed down on a piece of sushi that Dax had made. "Watch my daughter." He paused to take another bite of the gold-flaked roll. "Or else."

Just recalling the man's terrifying presence sent shivers down his spine. "Maaaaaaaaaaaaan.."

After a few moments of deliberating and pouting, the sparkling man came to a decision. He rolled his shoulders a few times before cracking his neck and flexing his fingers into golden spikes.

"Been awhile since I had a workout, good of a time as any." Snickering as he dug the golden claws into the icy bedrock, he ascended the mountain a few feet at a time. The wind howled and pelted the Goldmonger with shards of ice and snow.

It was a grueling climb, one that even the most advanced would struggle with. Dax was left with nothing but his thoughts in his head as his body was put through a spectacular trial of physical prowess. It felt like hours, the conditions making it hard to keep track of time, he had no idea how long he had been climbing. All he knew was that few others could handle such a feat.

"Hey!" Hina shouted out. "What are you doing..?"

Dax froze in his tracks as he turned back to see Hina on the ground staring up at him. As he had only made it about twenty feet or so up the cliffside before she had found him.

"C'mon already, Gramp's house is just over there." She barked with a judgemental look, "We won't ever catch up to Kazu if you keep goofing off like this."

WC 643/15,015/13,500

Tue Dec 05, 2023 8:24 am

Unfortunately, Richard couldn’t spare a moment to answer the mink’s question. He was understandably a little preoccupied with his missing limb situation. The healing concoction was nowhere near enough to stem the crimson tide. He could feel the darkness at the edges of his vision creeping closer.

Panic, fear, disbelief... One by one, the former doctor shut out all the useless distractions. Ice-cold professionalism pushed them out of the operating room of his mind. Only the facts remained on the table.

The patient was a 49-year-old male with a long history of smoking and substance abuse. His left leg had been torn off just below the knee, resulting in heavy blood loss. The injury was caused by a human bite. Therefore, the risk of infection was very high.

Time to get to work.

Stubbornly clinging to life, the rat crawled to his suitcase. His trembling hands spent precious seconds fumbling with the locks. Finally, the treasure trove clicked open. The scrambled contents spilled to the cave floor. He dug through them feverishly.

A simple tourniquet, a mere noose made of leather, strangled the broken limb. Liquid that stung like acid cleansed the wound. Blades carved through clumped cloth and mangled meat. Bandages sealed the remains. Finally, a wave of drugs illegal in twenty countries swallowed the pain, leaving behind only dull throbbing.

Closing the suitcase, the doctor collapsed to the cave floor. In an effort to keep the looming doom off of his mind, he tried to focus on the positives. For starters, he was still alive... In the middle of a hostile island... Lost in a cave... One leg shorter. So, he had never been particularly good at this whole ‘positive thinking’, no, it was not for him.

Meanwhile, the mink was desperately trying to figure out what was happening here. It didn’t help that his brain was dancing the mushroom samba. Thoughts twirled around his head, strumming guitars and banging drums. All that noise was making it really difficult to concentrate.

Suddenly, all the thoughts aligned into a conga line. The crazy dude working for the Queen had found him... Obviously an assassin. They were coming. So, this place wasn’t safe... Had to get out of here, man. But! The suit dude had killed the assassin. That made the dude a friend. Totally how it worked. And cool guys don’t leave friends behind. Simple!

Springing to action, the llama man hustled over to the wounded rat and dragged him upright. “Come on, dude! We can’t stay here. The walls are listening.” Hoisting the lanky arm over his shoulder, he supported the lopsided man. “I’ll take you to Jiro! He always knows what to do!” Plus Jiro was the only person on this island he knew. Kind of narrowed it down.

Too weary to even argue, Richard surrendered to his fate. He wouldn’t get far alone in this sorry state. His greedy fingers clutched the suitcase handle tightly. Even at death’s door, he refused to leave his belongings behind.

Time marched on relentlessly in the darkness. The tunnels were a murky, labyrinthine blur. Each turn looked the same. Every path felt identical to the last. Directions -cardinal and otherwise- lost all meaning.

Eventually, the mismatched duo emerged from the inky tunnels into a pale landscape. Fog hung over the island like a patchy curtain. Snow crunched softly beneath their feet. Icy rain whipped their backs. White winds howled.

“...And that’s my story.”

Richard cast an incredulous look at his unlikely ally. “What story...?” He wheezed weakly. “You just said ‘Hey, listen, man...’ and then stared at the walls for the rest of the way.” Frankly, he had preferred it that way.

The mink seemed equally puzzled. “I did? You sure? Dude...” And he had been so sure he had just shared his harrowing tale with his new friend. It had twists and turns like you wouldn’t believe. Too bad there was no time for a recap anymore.

Slowly, the two strange travelers made their way up the mountain path. Through the hazy veil, the rat spotted dozens of bisected silhouettes. He closed his eyes, quietly hoping he was just hallucinating. No, he absolutely had not seen human heads and torsos sticking out of the snow. When he opened his eyes, they would be gone.

Three... Two... One...

Oh.

Much to the injured man’s surprise and relief, the torsos turned out to be just monkeys submerged in hot springs. The surprise lingered, when he found himself dragged closer to the steaming pools. It slowly evolved into paranoia. What was the addict planning now...?

“Hey dudes! Is Jiro around?”

Words: 768
Total: 13 711 / 13 500

Thu Dec 07, 2023 6:25 pm

For all of its abundant and diverse fauna, Rubeck should be feared for one creature above all else.

Hundreds of years ago, in the infancy of the island's deep history of smuggling, an incident that would change the course of the island's evolutionary chain forever.

Rubeck | A port whose name has long since been forgotten

"Oi.... 'Areful wiff those crates, aye..." The voice was raspy and full of base. "' Boss 'on't want nuffin fallin out..." It belonged to a man just shy of seven feet and wider than an outhouse.

"Yeah, yeah, we 'ears yah..." A nasally voice shouted back as he haphazardly tossed a crate onto the dock.

RAAAAOOOOWWLLLL

The shrill screech echoed from the box as it collided with the ground. "Whatta...Whatta ya thinks in 'ere, aye?" The tiny man questioned as he peered into one of the holes.

"Uhhhs... I 'on't think we's are supposed to do dat..." The large man warned before a finger came shooting out of the hole and into the mouse man's eye.

"YEEEOOOWCHH!" He explained, falling backward onto his rear end. "WHY's I OUTTA!!" Shouting as he kicked out at the box like a child throwing a tantrum.

The shrill screech echoed out once more as several fingers could be seen grasping out of what were now clearly air holes for some kind of creature. The noise continued as the box shook aggressively.

"Yeaaaaa shut' cha ya trap, ya jabroni!" He barked back as he returned to his feet. "That's why's yous guys are in there, and us guys are out here. Yuckyuckyuckyuckyuck."

"Well uh, gee Gus, I's 'on't fink it's a good idea to tease em like dat..."

"Yeah, well, yous shut it too! I'm the brains 'round 'ere. I says what's a good idjea and what ain't..!" Confidently he leaned on the crate and gave it another swift kick for good measure.

"As longs as we's got dese 'ere..." He snickered as he patted his pant leg and paused. "..keys...?" His eyes now widen with fear as he saw the crate key dangling from a furry tail that had emerged from one of the air holes.

"Ahh fuck me..."

The aftermath of the incident spread to the local populace and islands like wildfire. Local newspapers reported a band of smugglers violently dismembered by their animal captives. They issued a warning to stay away from the island as the main culprit of the incident was a large troupe of Humandrills.

A highly adaptable and capable species from the Grandline known for their ability to mimic human behavior perfectly.

Having watched the smugglers for so long, these animals were highly cunning and brutal. Having waited for the perfect opportunity to escape, but only after releasing all of the other animals on board the ship as well.

In the hundreds of years since, this incident and its specific details have faded into obscurity. However, neighboring islands and sailors to this day have avoided Rubeck because of the myths and rumors that have survived.

Stories that are made true to this day by the two species from that incident have come to dominate the food chain in the area. With only a small populace of Sea Wolves, the previous apex predator on the island, surviving to this day. Though it has been pushed to the rocky coastlines to survive.

Present Day | Mountain Hot Springs | Rubeck

Deep in the snow-capped mountains of Rubeck, there exists a small group of natural wonders nestled on this dark, dreary, and dangerous island.

Hidden in a grove of pines far from any civilization, the surviving Humandrills, now known as Mountain monkeys thrive in the warmth of the springs. Hot springs that were created as a result of the tunnels left behind by the ancient Digger Moles of old.

Steam filled the air as it rose into the sky, melting the incoming snow before it dissipated in the night sky. A group of mountain monkeys relaxed in the lower springs, submerged so far into the water it seemed as if only their pompadours were visible.

"Ooo oo.." A monkey said to another.

"Ahh ahh, ooo ooo, ah." Another replied back.

"OOH AHH" The largest of them all barked, causing them all to simmer down.

It was then that they noticed the Llama rushing through the trees. His golden pompadour bounced as he hauled ass as fast as he could through the snow.

In response to his query the group of monkeys all pointed further up the mountain. Signaling Jairo's location was in the highest spring.

As the mink left and passed the springs on his way, the monkeys would file out of the springs and trail behind. Soon creating a horde of creatures in Cuzco's wake.

791/15,806/13,500

Fri Dec 08, 2023 5:47 am

Richard watched the odd exchange with barely open eyes. Words barely registered in his mind. Or perhaps he was trying to block them out. Finally, a question slipped from his lips. “Am I delirious from blood loss or did you just ask a bunch of monkeys for directions...?” He was hoping for the former, but fearing the latter.

The llama mink didn’t even miss a beat. “Yeah, dude. They are Jiro’s posse.” His tone was as casual as the way he climbed the mountain. Even the slippery path was no match for his hooves.

There was a pause.

Just a beat.

“What...?”

“What?”

Dropping the matter out of sheer exasperation, the wounded rat focused on hobbling along. ...Not that his efforts made much difference, with all the size and strength difference between him and the helper. Still, he wanted to at least feel like he had some agency left in his life.

Lately, the self-proclaimed entrepreneur had been feeling a lot like a marionette. Dangling from unseen strings, he danced to the amusement of some higher power. Usually those higher powers were pirates of some kind. Between meeting, betraying and killing old associates, he was running short on any actual friends. Funny how that worked...

Thus, the sharp-dressed marionette didn’t even bother voicing his thoughts on the matter. He merely craned his neck enough to shoot a suspicious glance at the procession trailing behind them. Why were all these monkeys following along...? It didn’t sit right with him. Didn’t trust them. His squint focused especially on the matching, frankly ridiculous haircuts. Just... Why?

The ratio of questions to answers in his life was less than ideal at the moment.

Nevertheless, the strange group scaled the mountain fearlessly. Up in the distance, the white wisps of steam from the highest and hottest spring rose like a dancing veil. A distinct silhouette was lounging lazily in the natural bath. The biggest and mightiest of all haircuts reached for the heavens, standing proud as an unmistakable mark of manliness.

The rat’s eyes widened. Something inside him died a little, as the realization settled in. “Please don’t tell me that Jiro is a monkey...” His rhetorical mutter was quiet, pleading. He was begging for the world to stop, so he could get off this ride.

Unfortunately, it was taken as an invitation to answer.

“Sure is! The best boss with the biggest ‘do around.”

The monkeys hooted in agreement.

At this point, Richard’s patience ran out. The polite mask cracked. His shoulders heaved with a sigh. “Right. Let me get this straight. I’m knocking on death’s door over here, and your grand plan was to drag me up a freezing mountain, in the middle of nowhere, to meet a monkey with a weird haircut. No, that’s great. Fantastic. Brilliant, even.” If sarcasm had been visible, his words would’ve been dripping like tar.

The sky was rich on rain clouds, but poor on silver linings.

Then, the chemist made his final, fatal mistake... He carelessly dropped a simple, yet frighteningly potent catalyst into the cauldron of life. It took the form of a single sentence spoken out loud.

“On the bright side, this mess can’t possibly get any worse.”

Words: 534
Total: 14 245 / 13 500

Wed Dec 13, 2023 10:43 pm

Cuzco and the stranger climbed higher and higher, until they came to the Mountain Boss's Spring accompanied the whole way by a screeching horde. The beasts beat on the stone cliffs with enough strength to send cracks rippling on impact.

The smaller ones darted underfoot, tugging and grabbing at anything that dangled. While others spit water from above while they snickered and laughed.

"OOOH."

As if it heeded the beast's command, nature herself fell as silent as the horde did. With everyone's tongue locked away for fear of it being cut from their skull.

A shadow emerged from the pool, escorted by several female monkeys that seemed to be dragging it from the water.

"Like, that's guy maaaan.. I told you you man, I told you.." Cuzco muttered in a way that seemed directed less at those around him and more at the voices inside his head.

"Oo ah oo oo..." The beast grunted as the harem pulled him from the pond and onto land. Several others rushed over with towels and a jacket to throw over his shoulders.

The creature was muscular and compact, being no more than waste high when one discounted its outrageous hairdo, a massive permed pompadour unlike any other that adorned its head. With heavy-lashed eyes peaking out from behind a pair of sunglasses.

"Aah Oo Oo Ah." The monkey glared at the mink.

"Oh.. like, yeah man, totally... So this is the big boss man, man. The head honcho. The main monkey, man."

"OOH."

"Huh..!?" Cuzco snapped out of a daze, "Oh, right... It's Jiro. Boss Jiro...."

"His names Jiro."

With a sigh, Jiro turned his attention back to the maimed man in front of him. Then back to the Llama who seemed to fade in and out of consciousness by the minute.

"Ooh Oo." He nodded, prompting several monkeys to take ownership of the patient whether he wanted it or not. They stripped him of his clothes and forced him into the bath. Each one pampering him in a different manner. His hair, nails, gaping wound, all of it was attended to by the simians.

Jiro followed behind into the spring as he dragged the stoned mink along as well. Though, it was quite clear the water did not seem to have quite the effect on them as it did the stranger.

"Oo Oo...Aah..." Jiro asked the man as he draped himself over the side to stay afloat.

Foggy Boggy | A little while earlier

"What the shit are you shits supposed to be..?!" Momoiro growled as he gripped the hilt of his katana.

"Kawkawkawkaw... A joke if you ask me.." Karasu followed up.

"Stay on your guard." Okuma barked as he stared down those who now blocked their path.

"Shishishishishsihis... Been a long time, eh? Okuma...?"

"Not long enough." The bear responded sharply. "What are you doing here, Okami?"

"Kishishishishi, word went out a few days ago about needing some extra muscle to bring you down. Of course, I naturally volunteered my services free of charge. Because as you know..." His words trailed off as he slowly removed a blade from its hilt.

"There's nothing I'd love more than to kill you myself...."

The demon barber readied himself for a strike that never came as the wolf began his speech once more.

"But my friends here..." His arms now extended to highlight the group of well-armed mercenaries around him. "Well, now, they definitely want to get paid...."

"Kishishishshishishis... Better run." With a snap the trio was surrounded, dozens emerged from the forest and the fog.

"Shit shit shit....!" Momoiro grunted as he desperately fended off wave after wave of attack. The enemies amount to glimpses of shadows and parried metal. Barely reacting fast enough to defend himself much less counterattack.

"Stay focused!" Okuma shouted as he released a wave of conquerors haki to flood the area. An act promptly followed by a dozen or more sudden splashes.

WC 655/16,461/13,500

Thu Dec 14, 2023 3:15 pm

Fate did not take kindly to being tempted. As soon as the wounded rat spoke the forbidden words, the monkey horde descended upon him like a locust swarm. Countless grubby little hands latched onto his belongings. The hat, suitcase, even the actual suit... Nothing was safe.

The startled doctor patted his now bare head. His wide eyes darted around wildly. “What the-?” He swiped after his hat. “Hey, don’t- Don’t touch that!” He feebly reached after his suitcase. One after another, he was stripped of his belongings. His weaponry. And his dignity. Granted, there wasn’t much of that left anyway.

Thankfully for everyone involved, the criminal chemist was too hurt to put up much of a fight. His hand brushed against the pocket containing the most potent poisons... When it came to little pests, fumigation was the best method. ...Except that the aforementioned pocket was now also slipping away from him, along with the rest of the jacket.

Thus, Richard’s valiant last stand amounted to wriggling and protesting. “Those are mine! You can’t do this! I’ve met mountain bandits with more professionalism than-” He paused. The absurdity of the situation hit him. “Why am I arguing with a bunch of monkeys...?” Felt like a hammer to the skull.

Dragged to the steaming bath, the dubious doctor dejectedly accepted his fate. His exhausted eyes stopped on the boss running this monkey business. There was no such thing as a free lunch. Or a free bath, in this case. Everyone wanted something. Money, favors, power... At this point, he was simply waiting for the boss to voice his terms.

When the manly monkey voiced the idle question, the weary rat shook his head. “Just a business deal that went sideways.” His gaze drifted downwards. The bloodied stump throbbed in reminder of his misfortune. Or perhaps... “Guess I should count myself lucky. Losing a limb is a cheap price in this line of work, see.” He told, mostly to himself.

Jiro picked at his teeth idly. “Oo oo, ah aah.” He commented, without much in the way of sympathy. A true boss knew empty words got them nowhere. They needed solutions here.

Richard’s eyes gained a skeptical spark. “Well, that’s easy for you to say.” The water splashed, as he gestured vaguely at himself. “You’re not the one with a target on your back.”

The monkey boss shrugged. “Aah aah, ooh.” He offered, simply as an idea.

In turn, the crook paused to consider it. The throbbing was making it tough to focus. “Okay, let’s say I succeed. Then what?” He swept a hand broadly towards the coast, spraying water. “All the ships are under her thumb. Nothing gets in or out without her knowing.” No matter how he looked at it, he was trapped here.

Jiro flashed a cocky grin. “Ooh.” He shot his comment with a cheeky finger gun.

However, Richard wasn’t quite convinced. No, scratch that. He didn’t believe it for a second. “You’re mad. It can’t be done.” Injured or not, he didn’t stand a chance against the woman and her army of blindly loyal lackeys.

At this point, it was important to realize that the rat didn’t actually understand a single word from the monkey. He was merely arguing with the phantoms of delirium dancing at the edges of his consciousness. Unfortunately, said phantoms weren’t being very helpful. What they were suggesting was practically suicide...

Words: 567
Total: 14 812 / 13 500

Sat Dec 16, 2023 9:52 am

The stranger mumbled as he faded in and out of consciousness. Such a wound would take its toll on anyone. Luckily for him, while he was rambling, Jiro directed his harem to pack the wound full of a strange mixture of local herbs.

It also helped the monkey boss understood every word of these delirious ramblings. Gave him a better picture of what this man had dealt with. Only one '"her" around here, and that's the queen, and anything with the queen meant trouble.

"Oo, oo oo. He barked, sending a half dozen of the horde scattering into the woods to scout the area for any stragglers that may have followed them.

"Ahhhh...." Cuzco let out a relieving sigh, "Heh... waters like, warm man, hehe.."

Jiro sat for the second puzzle, until it hit him, a rush of warm then cool water that could only mean one thing.

"Ooh, Ooh, AHHHH, AHHHHHHHHH!!!" Jiro screeched out in rage as his harem rushed to drag him out of the pool. Once on land the creature rushed over to the mink and grabbed him by his long spindly neck. The horde accompanied their boss as they beat on the ground and screamed themselves.

"AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH" He howled with spit flying in the Llama's face as he struggled for air.

It looked as if for a moment the mountain boss had no intention of stopping until a noise grabbed the attention of the entire troupe. All of them froze and stared eyes locked at the bottom of the mountain spring path.

From the shadows emerged the Wharf Rats, led by Kazu, a young man who sported a magnificent pompadour of his own. It bounced with every geta clacking step and swayed with the wind, a glory only rivaled by Jiro's own.

Shohei and Ichiro beat on drums that hung from their necks while Koji plucked a shamisen. While Kazu and Chino walked at the front with heads held high as the group ascended the path. The lesser monkeys backed down as they passed, all of them very well aware of their place beneath one with a pompadour such as that.

With a deep inhale, Kazu shouted to the heavens.

"JIIIIIIRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOO!!!"

With his coat draped over his shoulders, the mountain boss swaggered to the top of the mountain path. For a moment once more as if nature itself bent to his will. The crescent moon peaked out from the clouded sky, setting the backdrop for the boss's entrance.

Kazu glanced upon the boss of the mountain, the crescent moon at the monkey's back. "I'm here to challenge you." Kazu barked, "I know you won't join us if I ask nicely, so I ain't here to fuckin ask. I'm here to fuckin take, the only language you seem to fuckin speak."

"[/b]Oo Oo, Aah.[/b]" Jiro called out arrogantly, removing a switchblade comb from his belly band. "Aah Aah, Oo Oo Oo Oo, Aah Aah." A half-cocked hooting echoed out from the boss as if the idea of a challenge from him was a comedy routine.

"It's been a long time, I ain't no fuckin kid anymore, Jiro... I can beat you."

Jiro's round eyes peaked around his glasses, glaring down at the Wharf Rats with a look that could kill. "Ooo Oo...?"

"AAAAH AAAHHHH AAAHHHH!!" Jiro roared as he beat on his chest, sending the horde once more into a violent chorus. They scrambled across the rocks as they began to set the stage for the challenge.

Hammers, nails, wood, and chairs, within minutes a stage was built with two barber chairs in the center. Monkeys had ropes tied around their heads and formal coats draped over their shoulders. Like an audience, they sat on the cliffs and trees all around, patiently waiting for the main event.

"Ooo! Ooo! Jiro shouted, holding up five fingers before disappearing into a nearby cave.

"Y-you think you can do this, boss..?" Ichiro mumbled.

"I gotta say Kazu, I'm a bit worried myself.." Koji said with rare sincerity in his voice.

"Don't worry guys." With a crack of his knuckles, he paused, "I've been waiting for this day my whole fuckin life."

691/17,152/13,500

Sun Dec 17, 2023 12:39 pm

Teetering on the edge of eerily blissful darkness, Richard desperately clung to consciousness. Couldn’t fall asleep here... Or he wouldn’t be waking up anymore. He struggled to tell where reality ended and hallucinations began. Everything that had happened in the past few hours, days... Years... certainly wasn’t making it any easier.

For one, the biting cold was no longer gnawing at the rat. Lovely heat flowed through his veins, washing away creeping chill. He lifted his hand from the steaming bath. Warm water cascaded past his fingers. Right then. Felt real enough.

Second, the throbbing pain was slowly fading away. At first, the doctor was inclined to check his pulse. Fingers on his wrist, he counted... After a minute or so, he had to begrudgingly accept that there were indeed still beats to count. In fact, they just kept coming with no end in sight.

However, as a man of science, Richard had to draw the line somewhere. A perfect breakpoint presented itself in the form of a shout that shook the mountain. He craned his head towards the source and squinted... Before promptly deciding the sight was impossible. A fever dream. Had to be.

While the audience found their seats, some of the stagehands went to fetch the props for the contest. One of them was the injured rat, who loudly protested his treatment. The other was the llama mink, who didn’t seem to know which planet he was on, nor really care for that matter.

Once the promised five minutes of mercy were over, the drums of war started echoing through the night... Jiro emerged from the cave. He twirled the switchblade comb in his hands, striking poses. His fans went wild. Bashing in admiration, he sauntered into the arena with the unbridled confidence of someone six feet taller. Hooting and hollering rang out like thunder.

The atmosphere felt electric.

Richard’s eye twitched. He felt that -considering the circumstances- he had been rather polite. Positively neighborly even. But... Being sat down on a barber chair with nothing but a cloth curtain around his neck was the famous last straw. “No. No, I refuse. I will not play any part in this nonsense.” He tried to hop away.

Kazu, however, didn’t allow it. “Fuckin’ shut it and sit down, you ungrateful fuckin’ geezer.” His strong hand yanked the crook back and planted him firmly onto the chair.

“Not that old...” The lanky man muttered bitterly.

Sadly, the young barber heard none of it. He was too preoccupied with the opponent in front of him. “This is a battle between MEN! Ya ain’t fucking involved in this.” To underline his bold declaration, he crossed his arms and puffed his chest.

Richard glanced down at the barber chair. “I’m feeling pretty involved...”

Before the rat could protest further, the world around him turned into a blur of water and shampoo. He could feel his scalp getting kneaded like dough. Strands of hair were getting lathered and rinsed, repeatedly. If this was meant to be a new form of torture, it was working.

Kazu’s hands were flying at speeds that would’ve made seasoned martial artists blush. Every motion carried purpose. Wash away the impurities... Bring in the air... Again and again, he repeated the combination. He hadn’t spent all these years just sitting on his ass. This was the result of tireless training!

However, Jiro was not easily outdone. He was the boss of this mountain and it was time he showed why. Where poor humans were limited by their two measly arms, Jiro had four equally dexterous ones and a tail to boot. He was like a hurricane of comb and hair gel.

Casting a glance at the opponent, the young challenger flashed a cocky grin. “Hairstyling is more than just fuckin’ fancy tools and techniques...” His eyes blazed with raw confidence. Like twin flames, they lit the night. “It’s the burning passion of the heart! So feel the fuckin’ HEAT!” Brandishing the comb like a blade, he braced himself.

“Sure-kill... Pompadour... SUPREME!”

In a single, smooth motion, Kazu delivered a mighty upwards comb slash. Jiro responded in kind, bringing his own switchblade down like a guillotine. The very air crackled with the Color of the Supreme Hairstylist. In fact, it almost looked as if the two combs weren’t even touching the hairdos...

As the wind died down and the dust finally settled, the two warriors stepped back. The results of their fierce battle were plain for all to see. Not a single strand of shame covered either contestant.

The llama mink’s manly hairdo had grown to new heights. It positively pulsated with raw, unadulterated power. Glistening in the moonlight, it commanded attention and respect. Those with lesser do’s were cowering their heads in quiet shame.

Richard’s brown hair stood firm, like a pillar. His gray strands were incorporated into the sculpture, like veins of power running through the mighty shaft. Thanks to the burning passion, it looked a lot bigger than ever before. Bigger, longer and uncut... Defying gravity, it throbbed defiantly in the breeze.

But what did the audience think...?

Someone ran off to fetch a measuring tape...

Words: 859
Total: 15 671 / 13 500

Sun Dec 17, 2023 1:14 pm

The shamisen cut out with the drums as a wave of silence fell over the crowd, leaving only the whisper of the wind behind.

The monkey rushed back with a long stick with notches in it. Its decoration appeared ceremonial, as feathers hung from the top while a straight razor and comb dangled from leather straps. He quickly held it up to Maxwell's raging hair on.

"Ahh Ahh Ahh...!?!" The monkey screeched, the notch representing the good doctor well surpassing that of any other.

The chorus of the troupe joined in as the sound of drums continued once more. The monkeys in the cliffs and trees above rained down pink petals as Jiro's former harem placed a yakuza coat over the boss's bare shoulders before dancing around him.

The coat, the aura, the pompadour... It seemed to engorge the once small man into the role he was thrust into. No longer a scrawny man, no, before them was a hardened yakuza boss, a bulging vein of a man with a pompadour only spoke about in legends.

"Ooo Ooo! Aaah Aahh!" Jiro barked as a small yet loyal band of monkeys flanked his sides.

The remaining beasts numbered in the dozens and sided with the man they deemed their new leader. An unprecedented warrior who sported the pompadour of a much larger man.

"The fuck..?!" Kazu shouted as the Wharf Rats found themselves huddled together as a group of monkeys surrounded them.

"I...I thought you won boss..." Ichiro stuttered.

"Tch... So did I...!"

"Aahh Aaaahh!" Jiro screeched as he pounded on his chest, "Oooh Ooo! Pointing to Maxwell before mimicking a throat slice.

"Looks like I got winner..." Kazu mumbled to himself, his hands gripping tight on the wooden fish bat.

WC 291/17,443/13,500

Sun Dec 17, 2023 2:59 pm

Strange aura roiled around the quiet rat. ...No, he was a rat no longer. Gone was the quivering coward and the snarky sourpuss. In their place now stood a wolf, a proud beast of the mountain. This was a rebirth. And definitely not the delirium getting worse. If an afro made a champ, then a pompadour made a boss.

Richard stood up from his seat. Having one leg shorter than the other was irrelevant to a guy of his caliber. His face twisted into a tough glare. “Huh?! Whazzat?!” The loud, boisterous tone silenced the monkeys. “Ya got somethin’ to say, then say it to my face!” He stared down the sore loser.

Jiro accepted the challenge and marched closer. Locking eyes with the uppity newcomer, he folded his arms. “Oo oo. Aaa. Ooo!” The cold comment left an echo in the air. His supporters hooted wildly at the devastating burn. Oh yes, he went there. There was no recovery from that one.

The new boss scoffed at the trash talk. “Tch, real men talk with their fists.” He cracked his neck side to side. His knuckles echoed the satisfying, intimidating song. “I hear ya, though... Loud and clear.” There was only one way this was going to end.

However, when the other monkeys started raising their fists, the pompadour boss stopped them with a dramatic arm swipe. “Stand back, boys!” He grabbed the coat resting over his shoulders. “A man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do.” Tossing it into the wind, he raised his fists.

Despite their differences, that was something the monkey boss actually agreed on. Mimicking the motion, he ordered his remaining underlings to stay out of this. And, to flex even further, he cast aside his switchblade. Weapons had their place and this wasn’t it. No, this was hand to hand. Fist to fist. Mano a mano. A true man's battle where only the strongest, hardest and manliest would win!

“Well? You gonna throw a punch or just stand there?”

“Aah Aahh! AAAHHH!”

Acting in unison, the two fighters threw their punches. The twin impact shook the stage. On both sides, the fist dug into the opponent’s cheek, rattling the gritted teeth. Neither side would budge.

Jiro was quicker on the recovery. A foot curling into a fist swung upwards and clashed against the foe’s abs. It was rewarded with a pained cough.

Yet, Richard didn’t miss a beat either. He brought his other hand down like a hammer against the opponent’s skull. It left twirling stars around the monkey’s head.

The exchange quickly erupted into a vicious brawl. Punch to punch, kick to kick... Matched in strength and ferocity, they traded vicious blows. Each strike sent shockwaves across the snowflakes dancing in the wind. Droplets of crimson painted the arena one splatter at a time.

As the incredible battle raged on, the two fighters were proving to be all too equal. Neither one could find an opening for a decisive blow. Each punch merely invited a retaliation. Even their mighty hairdos clashed like clubs.

When one went for a grab, the other followed suit. Slamming their hands together, palm to palm, they tried to wrestle the other to the ground. Locked in the struggle, they glared at each other. Lightning crackled between their eyes.

Words: 550
Total: 16 221 / 13 500

Sun Dec 17, 2023 6:31 pm

The ground shook at the collision of the mighty mountain bosses, strength and hair they knew no equal but one another. Blow for blow, they bloodied the other with every strike. Dodging, evading? They had no place in a hard-boiled brawl such as this.

It soon resulted in a sweaty grapple as their massive do's rubbed and clashed with every toss. The surrounding troupe hooted and howled amongst the banging of the drums, fueling the testosterone-filled arena.

"What the fuck is going on here...?" Hina mumbled, having wandered up the mountain path to stumble on a dispute between two hard-boiled men.

"It's....A.... Pheww.. Holy shit, you are fucking fast..." Dax managed to spit out between the heavy breaths. "This hiking shit sucks..."

"Hey..! Hellooooo!!" Hina shouted at the frenzied crowd, though it fell on deaf ears, unable to break their attention from the fight.

"Oh, yeah, that's fucking pointless." The Goldmonger stated. "They are full on, locked the fuck in. That's a hard-boiled brawl for a man's honor."

"A what...? A brawl for honor? That sounds stupid. You fight to kill or you don't fight at all."

"Ya know, that's the first fuckin thing I agree with you on." He snickered, "If it were up to me, I'd just put a knife in their gut and call it a fuckin day. Fuck all that fightin honorably shit."

"Uhhh... Hey sparkles... wanna give me a hand over here..?" Hina stammered as a group of monkeys surrounded her.

"Oi, you furry fucks. Hands off the girl." Dax snarled as Sone Ki Naagin slithered through the air, slashing the air around the girl. Forcing the beasts back without injuring them.

"I won't miss twice. So do us all a favor, eh? Go back to watchin the fuckin fight and mind ya business." The threat was enough to send them fleeing and back to the battle. Looking back to the girl he gave her a glare, "And what's this fuckin sparkles shit now, eh?"

As the fight continued, the freezing rain began to fall once more. Each droplet evaporated on contact with the hard-boiled shell of the brawlers, their bodies burning from the manliness.

Once more Dax popped up a golden umbrella to avoid the icy shower. "Might as well get fuckin comfortable, looks like it might be awhile."

WC 384/17,827,13,500

Mon Dec 18, 2023 3:10 pm

Fingers locked, the two manly warriors wrestled for dominance. Rolling across the splintered arena, they took turns being on top. However, even at bottom, one could find the power to push back. Thus the back and forth didn’t let up even for an instant.

Briefly, Jiro managed to wrap the man into a headlock. Those four paws could do things human hands could never manage. He had the foe looking like a pretzel. Hooting furiously, he choked the man like a chicken.

Richard was really taking a pounding. He was going to be sore tomorrow... Yet, his spirit burned brighter. With a mighty grunt, he broke free of the hold. A quick roll let him steal back the initiative. Bending the monkey over his knee, he gave the furry fiend a vicious spanking.

However, all too soon the fighters found themselves in another deadlock. The cacophony of noises around them went ignored. There was only them and the passion of battle. Neither side would relent. After all, no man ever went into a fight intending to lose.

With a violent yank, the brawlers broke free. Getting the exact same idea, they delivered a ferocious straight. The mirrored punches carried enough strength to send them both skidding backwards. Bruised and bleeding, yet still grinning, they sized each other up...

“Oo oh Aah?” Jiro asked arrogantly, flexing his muscles.

“Heh, not even close. I can keep going all night long, punk.” Richard grinned back.

The monkey’s glare narrowed... And his smile sharpened. “Aah... Aah aah!” He dared the opponent.

In response, the rat spat out a tooth and some blood. His eyes burned with peculiar madness. “Yer on!” Folding his arms, he stood still, like a defiant statue.

Jiro didn’t waste a heartbeat. He shot forward like a pale rocket. Dust billowed at his tail. All four paws curled into firm fists. As he reached the foe, he unleashed his pent-up rage all over his face. Punches fell like rain. It felt like time itself slowed down to watch the violent beatdown.

What felt like a small eternity was over in seconds. The monkey boss staggered back, panting and wheezing. Utterly spent, but ultimately satisfied, he turned to flex at his followers. However... Much to his horror... No one was cheering.

And the looming shadow behind him refused to fall...

“...My turn.”

With the grim mutter, the heavily bruised yakuza rat grabbed his foe by the throat. His legs bulged with power. He leaped high into the air, dragging the opponent with him. The crescent moon painted their entwined silhouettes against the night sky.

“This is... the climax!”

Richard twisted the resigned opponent upside down... And brought him down in a devastating piledriver. They hit the mountain like a meaty, manly meteor. The impact cracked the ground. A shockwave blew the splintered arena away. Eerie silence settled upon the battlefield.

As the dust slowly settled, only one silhouette stood among the destruction. The new boss, Pompadour Maxwell, raised his finger to the sky. And the crowd went wild!

Words: 506
Total: 16 727 / 13 500

Sat Dec 23, 2023 2:56 pm

The climax of the battle came hard and fast as a wave of silence washed over the crowd.

The massive one-legged yakuza pointed to the sky triumphantly, his pompadour standing firm as the veins of gray seemed to pulsate in the wind.

"OOO OOO RRAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" The crowd went absolutely ape shit. Pounding, screeching, howling, it was chaos. Fights broke out among them all, each trying to emulate their new boss and establish the hierarchy beneath him.

Jiro came to his senses, using the opportunity to disappear in dishonor, slipping off into the shadows while those around him scuffled for dominance. All that mattered now was survival, a rematch is always possible if he can do that.

Once again, even in disgrace, it seemed like nature itself was on Jiro's side. The sky opened like a valve as the black clouds thickened above and it was then that the rain truly came.

Water dumped from the sky on top of the troupe, scattering them into the nearby trees and caves in hopes of saving their pompadours. Something any seasoned delinquent would know.

All but one seemed to take cover, the newly crowned boss. The King Rat stood fearlessly in the face of the storm's fury as he relished his newfound glory.

"What the fuck..?!" Kazu shouted from the other side of the battlefield as he couldn't believe his eyes. With every strand of hair that fell out of place, the power seeped out like steam from the water-logged boss's body, growing smaller and smaller by the second.

WC 256/18,083/13,500

Fri Dec 29, 2023 9:56 am

Belief was power. In this world, those who believed in themselves could accomplish great things. And where actual willpower failed, delusion would do just as well. After all, some of the greatest heroes started off as mere boastful liars.

However...

Even the strongest delusions had their limits.

Pompadour Maxwell held the victorious pose... But his hairdo didn’t. The bitter cold rain washed away the gels keeping his manhood erect. Power left his frame like the steam rising from his body. With one last spurt of wispy white, his manhood went limp.

He was spent.

Finished.

Done.

The return to reality wasn’t a pleasant one. Richard collapsed. His back hit the splintered ground. Pain pounded against his skull. Every breath tasted like blood. He didn’t know whether to be thankful that he was breathing at all... Or curse the fact.

As soon as the monkeys saw their new boss fall, the bickering stopped. Awkward silence filled the space between the pitter and patter of rain. They glanced at each other. One monkey coughed. Someone blew their nose and wiped the snot on a rival’s fur.

Monkey see, monkey do. Rather than even consider helping the injured man anymore, the fickle animals flocked to the next biggest boss around. Naturally, that dubious honor fell to the last barber standing.

Kazu looked at the lesser pompadours gathering around him. Folding his arms, he cocked his head and lifted a curious brow. “Oh? Oh ho fuckin’ ho? So now ya shits recognize the real boss, huh?” This was nowhere near the way he had expected the battle to go...

...Buuut a victory was a victory.

The barber gathered his voice. “Alright, lissenup, ya fuckin’ furballs!” If he puffed his chest any further, he might burst. “From now on, ya answer to me! Got that?!” The new king of the hill was crowned to the sound of thunderous hooting.

Meanwhile, the llama mink wobbled over to the downed rat. He squatted down to poke the man with a stick, like a bored kid prodded a roadside dookie. “So, like, rat dude... Did you actually beat up Jiro, or was that the ‘shrooms?”

Words: 357
Total: 17 084 / 13 500

Wed Jan 03, 2024 6:48 pm

"Tch, that rat didn't beat up shit." Kazu barked at he mink as he swaggered over to help the half-dead man. With a nod, he sent his newfound monkeys to assist as well.

"The rat got boosted by the pomp." Grabbing some tape from a monkey they began to bandage what was left of his bloodied stump of a leg. "A pomp like that, shit...." Taking a moment to pause and appreciate his own skill that led to such power.

"Like, boosted by the pomp, man...?" Cuzco drooled back in confusion.

"A pompadour of that fuckin caliber? It siphoned off all the willpower from all these little half-assed shits around here. Collectin it all up into one massively engorged beast of a hairstyle."

"And all that fuckin power? It's gotta go somewhere and this rat was the one to take. To be completely fuckin honest, I can't believe the fuckers still kickin, ya know?"

"Ohhh yeah man, like, that totally makes fuckin sense, maaaaan. Yeaaaah." The Llama nodded with absolutely no comprehension of what he was told.

"KAAAAZZZZUUUUUUU!!!!!!!" Hina shouted angrily, a bloodthirsty demonic aura flooded the area. Akin to a conqueror's will it sent a shiver down everyone's spine, even the Goldmonger took a few steps back from the girl for fear of his own safety.

"OH NO!" Shohei shouted, the feeling of dread scarred so deep into his bones it triggered a flight response like no other. The boy took off up the mountain and took cover in one of the pools.

As a boy, he and the other Wharf Rats had played a prank on Hina causing the loss of her eyebrows. Unfortunately Shohei, he was the first one to be caught and took the full force of the girl's anger. The thing about Hina is she is her father's daughter.

Inheriting the demon barber's ridiculously inhuman strength and temper.

"Oh fuck me.." Kazu glanced up to see the she-demon sprinting towards him. Though before he could react four clenched fingers made contact with his square jawline. The full extension of the girl's arm sent the pompadoured delinquent flying into the rocks Shohei decided to hide behind. Injuring both of them as a result.

"Hehehe." Koji snickered before being tossed like a rag doll himself, the shock of such action apparent to all as he collided head-first with the other two.

"P-Please.... Miss Hina... p-please..... I-It wasn't my idea...." Ichiro pleased desperately to no avail before the girl sent him flying towards the rest.

"HOW DARE YOU LEAVE WITHOUT TELLING ME!! AND TO COME HERE OF ALL PLACES!! DO YOU KNOW WHAT COULD HAVE HAPPENED WHILE YOU WERE GONE?! THE TOWN HAS TO DEFEND ITSELF NOW!!" Hina's mouth ran faster than a super spot-billed duck.

The girl continued to rant and rave at the boys as they all stared up in fear. Meanwhile, the Goldmonger wandered over to what was left of the stage. Observing a beaten and bloodied rat lying amongst the splinters.

"Hmmmm~?" Dax mused as he leaned in closer. "Well, well, well, I'll fuckin be. If it ain't the doc himself."

Leaning his head over Dax focused on the bloodied stump, "That's new ain't it?" The pirate snickered as he reached into the wounded man's pocket, fighting off his half-hearted attempts to defend himself.

"Relax pal, just making sure you are okay, can't have you hurtin yourself with anything you might have in here." With a twitch of his nose Dax caught a whiff of what he was looking for.

"Ahhhhhh~.... Yessss...." Almost orgasmic, Dax's eyes lit up as his hand reached into the tattered coat pocket. He could feel it, the shape, the golden locket was within his reach, and like a dragon he needed it.

"Like, what are we doing, man...?" Cuzco leaned closely, the Goldmonger feeling the mink's hot breath on his ear.

"What the fuuuuu-... ahhh...ahhh... AAHCCHOOO! Achoo! Achoo." Dax fell back in a sneezing fit, "Achoo, fuckin dam it shit, achoo!"

WC 662/18,745/13,500

Fri Jan 05, 2024 11:30 am

Both the poking and the question were ignored. It wasn’t that Richard didn’t notice, but rather he had no answers. To him, the past several minutes were an adrenaline-drenched blur. His heart was thumping like a hammer and the sound echoed inside his skull.

While the barber stepped in to bandage the injured crook, the furry posse gathered around him. Scratched their heads in itchy unison, they shared a puzzled look. One shrugged. Another voiced a quizzical ook. Thinking was not their strong suit.

Suddenly, though, one particularly bright simian snapped his fingers. Gesturing towards the hot springs, he hooted orders. The lesser monkeys sprung to action.

Soon, they returned carrying brown clothing that had seen better days, as well as a suitcase that had survived the cataclysmic showdown without a scratch. Surrounding the dizzy rat, they imitated the owner of the current biggest pompadour. The clothes were returned to their rightful owner.

...In a manner of speaking.

Richard found himself handled like a rag doll. His sharp suit was put on him backwards. One sock and shoe ended on his healthy leg, while the other half of the pair ended on his hands like ill fitting gloves. A particularly fashionable furball decided his tie looked better as a headband. By the time the hooligans got to his hat, they grew bored and simply plopped it on his face.

“...Thanks.”

The sarcastic and muffled mutter drowned beneath the fury of a woman scorned. It suited the wounded crook just fine, actually. He needed a moment to regain his bearings after... Whatever had just happened.

As a man of science, the doctor refused to believe the nonsensical hallucinations. There was no barber battle. He had not beaten up anyone. And he most certainly had not just heard a familiar voice that tugged at his fearful nerves like a golden fish hook.

However, the physician did believe in physical sensation. Like, say, someone rifling through his pockets, for instance. His eyes widened. Adrenaline spiked again. Greed strangled common sense. Shoving his elbow against the ground, he struggled to try and sit upright. The hat fell off and he got a good look at the culprit.

“...!”

Richard’s eyes bulged several inches away from his skull. His jaw dropped and tongue fluttered like a flag. A burst of snot shot from his nose. The scream that had first gotten stuck in his throat erupted to the skies.

“GYAAA-!”

Naturally, the rat recognized his good friend. How could he ever forget? They had been through so much together during their last adventure.

“-AAAAA-!!”

Really, he was rather surprised to see Mister Goldmonger still in one piece. Eluding the goons of the fearsome ogre was no easy task. Then again, the gold-enthusiast had proven that he could handle himself.

“-AAAAA-!!!”

He did wish the man would at least cover his mouth, however. Sneezing was one of the worst ways humans spread germs, short of expelling waste. And frankly, he felt a little vulnerable at the moment. Infection risks, see.

“-AAAAH!!!!”

Or at least that’s what he would have thought, if his thoughts hadn’t been drowning beneath that dreadful scream. Who was making such an awful racket, anyway? Oh, it was just him. Disassociation, see.

Words: 538
Total: 17 622 / 13 500

Sat Jan 06, 2024 9:30 am

The Wharf Rats stood no chance against Hina, even with the monkeys flanking her as reinforcements, the girl just seemed to toss them all away like children. Tearing through them like a hurricane through a port, bodies just seemed to fly in all directions.

"Ahhh... fuck..." Dax rubbed at his nose, trying to appease the tingle to no avail.

"ACHOO!"

"Like, wow man, you're like, sneezing a whole fuckin lot, huh?" Cuzco muttered backing away from the man out of disgust. An action that caused the fit to subside almost immediately.

"Ahhh... damn..." Dax sniffed and snuffled as he viciously rubbed his nose before wiping the tears from his eyes. "That fuckin sucked."

"Like, I fuckin bet, man." The mink responded, "That was like, kind of gross, ya know? Spitting everywhere like that and all, ya dig man?" The pot called the kettle black as the llama hocked a wad of tobacco-laced spit on the ground.

"Right..." Dax muttered, looking the nine-tall beast man up and down.

"So anyway." As if he blocked the mink from his brain, the Goldmonger went right back to the maimed rat.

"HEY!" Cuzco shouted.

"So, been a little fuckin while, huh pal~?" Dax mused as he poked at the bandaged stump. Ignoring the mink's intrusion, "Ya know, I might be able to help ya out here." A devilish smile erupted on his face, the golden shark teeth glistening in the faint snow-filtered light.

WC 239/18,984/13,500

[Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

[Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

Re: [Arc] [Rubeck Island Conquest][Part 2] Last Tango in Rubeck

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