[Episode] Clowning Around

Quest:

Anton let out a long, drawn out sigh as he flopped back in the deckchair. Never had a deckchair felt so comfortable in his entire life! But then again, it had been a long, LONG time he felt anywhere close to relaxed. After the whole affair on Lyneel, his superiors had decided that a little shore leave was in order. Shore leave, two words that sounded like the songs of angels the moment he heard them. No work, no pirates, no danger, NOTHING! Just sitting back and relaxing.

Sitting on the chair next to him, Celia was looking over some documents. Oh, she had been sent on shore leave as well, but she small woman always felt at home doing paperwork. It really was her way of relaxing, to be honest. She glanced over at Anton, sending the relaxed marine a small smile. Sure, she was tough on him, but that was because she wanted him to do well. And after everything he had been through, he deserved a break. It was kind of nice, seeing him so relaxed. Probably the most calm he had been in a very long time.

Anton wasn't thinking of anything right now. He was here. He didn't have to work. And this chair felt so, SO good! He didn't care if he just spent the whole of his shore leave lying here. Just so long as he didn't have to do anything.

"Warrent Officer La'croix."

And just like that, the inner peace was shattered. Celia couldn't help but flinch as Anton's peaceful expression morphed into one of despair. Anton's head turned so slowly that one could almost hear the bones in his neck grinding together. Standing there was a marine seaman, standing with a salute and slowly regretting having disturbed Anton as he saw his superior's face. Anton's voice came out in a small croak, like his body was fighting against saying anything.

"What...?"

The marine gulped nervously. "Erm, th-the captain needs to speak with you...sir." Anton knew what this meant. This always meant the same thing, whenever a superior officer needed to talk to you.

Anton felt like he was going to cry.

Captain Armagane held up the wanted poster before them. The poster depicted a woman in what appeared to be clown makeup. White facepaint, ruby red lips, black markings around her eyes, and as if to complete the image, wild blue hair. She was sporting the biggest grin anyone had ever seen. "This, is Samantha "Giggles" Maine. Bounty, nine hundred thousand beli. She's been causing a great deal of trouble for us as of late. Public mischief, assault, that sort of thing. Every time we try to apprehend her, she manages to slip away." He set down the poster, "We've heard reports she's in the area, and as one of the strongest marines in the area, we've...erm..."

Anton was sitting on the opposite side of the desk as the captain, Celia sitting beside him. What was unsual though was that Anton's head appeared to be covered by a sheet. The captain slowly reached forward, lifting up the sheet to see Anton's face. The marines' face was an expression of pure despair, coupled with resignation and possibly mind breaking misery. He hadn't been sure Anton was listening, until the Warrent Officer's bloodshot eyes moved to look right at him. Captain Armagane let the sheet drop back into place as he sat back down, clearing his throat.

"Anyway, with your qualifications, we figured you were the best one to try and apprehend her. We apologize for taking you off your shore leave, but we can't allow her to slip through our fingers again. Our reputation as marines is at stake." Celia nodded and rose to her feet. "Don't worry sir. We'll bring her to justice!"

There was a loud thud as suddenly Anton's head collided with the desk, causing both the captain and Celia to jump lightly. Anton remained there for a moment, and underneath sheet one could hear a long, despairing whine. The captain could only sit there and watch as Anton slowly rose to his feet, sheet still covering his head, and shuffled out of the room like a man heading for the gallows. The captain's eyes slowly turned to Celia, who gave a small smile and a sheepish smile. "He'll get the job done, don't you worry." The captain wouldn't really be faulted for having a hard time believing that, as Celia left the room after Anton.

Anton had, finally, come to terms with the fact that he would have to work during his shore leave, and more importantly have to fight a pirate to do so. It didn't mean he had to like it. He walked down the street with a slouch, muttering sadly to himself as Celia walked beside him. Unlike him, she was all diligence, looking around for any sight of their target. Glancing back at Anton, and seeing him shuffling along behind her, she gave him an irritated look.

"Ok, look, I get it. You're upset about losing your shore leave. But if we capture her quickly, you can go back and relax. So right now, I really need you to help me find her. She could be anywhere!"

Anton paused, his glazed expression looking up and past Celia. He reached up and pointed limply. "There she is."

Celia blinked and followed the pointing finger. There, stepping out of a nearby cafe, was a woman dressed in a form fitting clown outfit. It was all there. The white makeup, the blue hair, the silly way she was walking, everything! This, right here, was Samantha "Giggles" Maine, the pirate they were looking for. Celia stared in surprise.

"Well...that was fast." She glanced over at Anton, who didn't seem to realize the situation just yet. The smaller marine grunted and elbowed him in the ribs, trying to remind him of what he was supposed to be doing.

Anton immediately snapped out of it, drawing his sword and pointing it right at the clown. "SAMANTHA MAINES!" he screamed out, causing the clown pirate to pause and look over at Anton. He hadn't meant to shout, it was just, well, a reflex at this point, "U-Under order the marines, I am placing you under arrest!" Celia stood beside him, giving the pirate girl a stern look.

Samantha blinked as she looked at the two marines. She reached into her clothes and pulled out what appeared to be a small horn. She squeezed it with a loud 'honk!'.

Boss - Samantha Maines:

Anton La'croix used:
MT at Samantha
LT at Samantha
LT at Samantha
UT at Samantha

Samantha "Giggles" Maines used:
MT at Celia
LT at Anton
LT at Anton
UT at Anton
UT at Celia

Celia used:
UT at Samantha

The member 'Anton La'croix' has done the following action : Dice Roll

---

#1 'Reflex Check' : 19, 14, 4, 4

--------------------------------

#2 'Reflex Check' : 7, 6, 6, 20, 19

--------------------------------

#3 'Reflex Check' : 2

Everything seemed still for a moment, as the marines and clown pirate stared eachother down. One was trembling, one was determined, and the third just had a goofy look on her face. Not exactly the match up of the century.

Breaking the silence, Celia's cape flew back as she grabbed a couple of derringers, getting ready to fire.

And then, all of a sudden, Samantha was right next to Celia. How did she move so fast. And why was she suddenly holding a massive mallet!? Before the smaller marine could react, the clown pirate swung, the mallet hitting her dead on. Anton swore he heard a comical squeak as the smaller woman was sent flying into the wall. (Knock'em Flat - MT - hit)."Celia!" Anton cried out, spinning around just in time to be squirted with water from a seltzer bottle, held by the Samantha. Anton yelped as he felt the seltzer starting to burn lightly. (Strong Stuff - LT - hit). As Anton stumbled back, trying to wipe the burning water from his face, he felt his foot step one something that slid out from underneath him. Was...that a banana peel? Anton yelped out as he slipped, spinning into the air before landing flat on his back. (Prat Fall - LT - hit).

Samantha gave a small honk of her horn, satisfied with how she dealt with the marines. With a twirl of her hammer, she started to swagger away.

That was, until she heard something shifting behind her. The clown pirate paused and blinked, slowly looking back behind her.

And then was promptly kicked in the face. Not by a regular, human leg mind you. This was the leg of an oversized grasshopper. One that was standing up on its hind legs and dressed like that red haired marine. The grasshopper spun around, a second kick hitting her and causing her to spin. (Pirrohuete - MT - hit). Samantha stumbled back, trying to figure out what just hit her, before a third kick hit her right in the stomach, causing the air to be knocked out of her lungs. (Hopper Kick - LT - hit) Quickly regaining her composure, she realized the humanoid grasshopper was coming at her with a sword, grinding it along the ground to swing at her. Samantha quickly moved to the side, avoiding the blow and retaliating with a swing of her mallet, hitting the bug right in the face. (Grind Slash - LT - miss) (Samantha's UT - hit).

Quickly taking advantage of the opening, Samantha took off in a run. Anton took a second to recover, his face stinging from the seltzer on his face. Watching the clown run, he took off after her. As much as he didn't want to fight her, he was more afraid of the punishment for letting her get away.

Meanwhile, Celia tried to pull herself out of the wall. Damn...that hurt. Her whole body was in pain. As she pulled herself free, she was about to take off after them.

And then a rock, knocked loose from the wall, landed on her head. (Samantha's UT - hit)

Techniques used:

Anton La'croix used:
AoE at Samantha
UT at Samantha

Samantha "Giggles" Maines used:
MT at Anton
LT at Anton
LT at Anton
UT at Anton

The member 'Anton La'croix' has done the following action : Dice Roll

---

#1 'Reflex Check' : 10, 12

--------------------------------

#2 'Reflex Check' : 14, 8, 8, 18

Samantha ran down the street, her shoes squeaking all the while. Man, she really was going all out on the clown thing, wasn't she? That grasshopper she was fighting was rather curious. The kick hurt, but it wasn't enough to keep her down. She glanced over her shoulder, trying to see where the marine was.

Only to see Anton coming down from on high, screaming at the top of his lungs. Samantha let out a surprised 'honk' of her horn, leaping into the air just as Anton came down. As his foot hit the ground, the stones beneath them and the surrounding area cracked and splintered. A good thing Samantha wasn't on the ground when it happened. (B Flat - AOE - Miss). While she was still in the air, Samantha seemed to pull a long stick out from...somewhere (seriously, where was she holding all of this stuff?) and proceeded to slap Anton around repeatedly with the stick. (Slap Stick - MT - hit).

Anton spun around from the multiple hits. He quickly lashed out with a kick, hitting Samantha in the sternum, causing her to stumble back (Anton's UT - hit). The pirate clown stumbled back, clutching her stomach as if in pain. Anton blinked. The attack wasn't that hard, was it? As he slowly approached her, she suddenly straightened up, a boxing glove on a spring shooting out and smacking Anton right in the face! (Sucker Punch - LT - hit). Anton spun around, trying to regain his senses, only for a pie to suddenly smash him in the face. What was the damn thing made out of, concrete!? (Pie to the Face - LT - hit).

Anton fell back to the ground, the cream of the pie mixing with the sizzling pain. Suddenly, something crashed into his sternum. Did...did the clown just elbow drop him? Samantha climbed to her feet, grinning. She pulled out the horn and gave one quick, cheeky honk before taking off running.

techniques sued:

Anton La'croix used:
MT at Samantha
LT at Samantha
LT at Samantha
UT at Samantha

Samantha "Giggles" Maines used:
HT at Anton
UT at Anton

The member 'Anton La'croix' has done the following action : Dice Roll

---

#1 'Reflex Check' : 13, 10, 16, 8

--------------------------------

#2 'Reflex Check' : 10, 9

Anton was beginning to see just why this woman was causing so many problems for the marines. This girl hit like a truck, and was pretty fast on her feet as well. Now he just had to find where she had gone to? She was dressed as a clown! Those normally didn't blend in with crowds very well outside of a circus.

As he rounded the corner into an alleyway, something fell from above right in front of him. Anton only had a few seconds to think before he realized the round object was a bomb. Unfortunately for him, that's how long it took for it to detonate. (Kaboom! - HT- hit). The blast sent him rocketting into one of the walls, sending him crashing through. Meanwhile, up on the roof of the house, Samantha let out a silent giggle.

And then there was a loud shriek of anger and desperation coming from down below. Samantha blinked before suddenly, the enraged grasshopper lept up in front of her, black in the face from the explosion. With a swing of his sword, a burst of compressed air shot out, slamming into Samantha and sending her rolling back. (Sonic Cutter - MT - hit). Samantha's head was spinning from the attack, and she barely got time to comprehend what was happening, before Anton closed in. The marine's body was trembling, as he lashed out with a kick. It didn't hurt too much, but now Samantha felt her entire body trembling. (Trebol Kick - LT - hit) Before she could comprehend what was happening, a second kick knocked her up into the air. (Snap Kick - LT - hit) Anton quickly leaped upward. spinning in the air before delivering a final kick to launch her down and send her crashing through the roof. (Anton's UT - hit)

Landing, Anton was panting heavily. His face was still hurting from the burning seltzer from before, but at least he had managed to deliver some hurt to the clown. He walked over to the hole, peering down.

Only for Samantha to suddenly leap out, mallet in hand. With a heavy swing, she caught him in the face, knocking him back. (Samantha's UT - hit). The clown pirate grinned, giving a small 'honk' with her horn before taking off running. Anton let out a scream of frustration before chasing after her.

COMBAT TRACKERS:

Anton La'croix used
MT at Samantha
LT (buff) on self
LT (heal) on self
UT at Samantha

Samantha "Giggles" Maines used
MT at Anton
Lt at Anton
LT at Anton
UT at Anton

The member 'Anton La'croix' has done the following action : Dice Roll

---

#1 'Reflex Check' : 4, 6, 6, 10

--------------------------------

#2 'Reflex Check' : 2, 8, 2, 20

Anton had never felt this way about an assignment before. When it came to fighting pirates, Anton had always been afraid. He had always wanted to find some way to avoid having to fight them. But this time, he was mad. He wanted to catch this clown and beat them into the floor. She had been making an utter fool of him this entire time, and Anton didn't realize how much that would bother him until right now!

His face still stung from the water she had sprayed on him earlier. He was in pain. He was bleeding. And right now, his anger towards the pirate was pushing him onward. Thankfully, he hadn't been reduced to a throffing rage yet. He did have a small plan. If straight up attacking her didn't work, he would try ambushing her instead.

He could see her now, walking down the street without a care in the world. Seeing her so carefree after everything she did caused Anton's blood to boil. She didn't notice his presence yet. He had the advantage! Very slowly, he dragged the blade of his sword along one of his legs, causing the blade to vibrate. (Sonic Blade - LT). At the same time, his exoskeleton started to flake, the old layer coming off to reveal some better condition chitten underneath (Shed Skin - LT - 6 HP healed).

And then, Anton lept. Jumping high into the air, he shot towards Samantha, shrieking like a banshee. The clown pirate spun around in surprise, a look of shot and fright on her face as she swung her large mallet, at the same time Anton thrust forward with his blade. the two attacks collided in the air, a small shockwave emitting from the two, before they pushed them both back. (Great Spear - MT - miss) (Knock 'em' Dead - MT - miss).

Anton barely managed to land on his feet, the force from their combined attacks almost knocking him over. He only managed to right himself back up, just in time for another pie to hit him right in the face, knocking him flat. (Pie to the Face - LT - hit).

With a honk of her horn, Samantha closed in, ready to bring her mallet up to whack Anton. However, before she could do so, a sharp, painful tremble ran through her body, stopping her just before the downswing (Bonk! - LT - miss). Anton brushed the cream out of his eyes, just in time to catch this. Acting fast, he lashed out with his sword, catching Samantha on the leg with his blade. (Anton's UT - hit). For the first time ever, he heard a small yelp come out of the clown girl. She quickly responded with a swing of her mallet, catching Anton right in the face (Samantha's UT - hit).

Anton quickly shook the stars out of his eyes, looking over to see Samantha taking off running down the street. Well, so much for an ambush. He couldn't let her get away! The grasshopper marine scrambled to his feet. "Get back here!" he shrieked, chasing her.

COMBAT TRACKERS:

Anton La'croix used
HT at Samantha
UT at Samantha

Samantha "Giggles" Maine used
MT at Anton
LT at Anton
LT at Anton
UT at Anton

The member 'Anton La'croix' has done the following action : Dice Roll

---

#1 'Reflex Check' : 12, 7

--------------------------------

#2 'Reflex Check' : 10, 15, 13, 14

"Stop her!" Anton cried out as he charged down the street, chasing after the clown pirate, Samantha Maines. Seriously, how did she run so damn fast!? His body was aching from all the damage he had endured through all of this. Meanwhile, he was starting to see some wear and tear on her, but she was going strong for the most part. It was so frustrating! And he wasn't going to stand for it any longer!

Anton quickly hopped and flipped through the air, catching himself on his hands as his legs pointed out towards the retreating Samantha. "Sonic Cannon!" she shouted out, his legs rubbing together sharply. What appeared to be a ball of concentrated sonic energy shot through the air like a cannon ball, towards the back of the pirate.

As the ball approached her, Samantha looked back...and smiled.

Suddenly, she lept up into the air, her hands gripping hold of an overhanging street lamp. Anton's attack shot underneath her, harmlessly crashing into a nearby wall (it will not be fun paying for the damages). (Sonic Cannon - HT - miss) Swinging around the pole, Samantha suddenly flew up into the air, spinning around as she headed towards Anton. Then, all of a sudden, she shot down like a bullet, crashing into Anton's sternum, feet first, like a bullet. (Stick the Landing! - MT - hit)

The air was forced from Anton's lungs, giving him little to no time to react before Samantha seemed to stomp on him over and over again. It would only be a few minutes later that she realized that she was actually dancing atop of him...badly. (Crazy Legs! - LT - hit)

Anton started to flail around, trying to throw the clown girl off of him and hit her with his sword. Unfortunately for her, Samantha moved faster than him, leaping off of him and avoiding her attack. As if to add insult to injury, she spun in mid air and smacked him in the face with that damn spring powered boxing glove! (Anton's UT - miss) (Sucker Punch - LT - hit)

Anton was gasping for air, his whole body in pain as Samantha took off running. Anton coughed and spluttered as he climbed to his feet. "somebody...stop h-" and then, something collided with his face.

Samantha had thrown an apple at him. (Samantha's UT - hit)

COMBAT TRACKERS:

Anton La'croix used
AoE at Samantha
UT at Samantha

Samantha "Giggles" Maines used
AoE at Anton
UT at Anton

The member 'Anton La'croix' has done the following action : Dice Roll

---

#1 'Reflex Check' : 2, 14

--------------------------------

#2 'Reflex Check' : 7, 16

Anton was panting heavily, his body effectively running on fumes. but he couldn't stop. He was on an assignment. He had to capture this clown! Not to mention he was still ticked off to high heaven at her. But where had she gone? The damn girl was fast, even with all the damage she had taken. Granted, Anton was for more worse off than she was.

And then, he spotted her. She was just, well, standing there, in the middle of the street. A big grin on her face. She was looking right at him. The damn clown was mocking him! Anton growled and started running towards her, his sword ready to strike. As he closed in, she suddenly raised a hand, the universal signal for him to stop. Anton, a little confused, paused. She then raised a finger, as if to say 'give me a moment'.

Anton blinked as she pulled something out of her pocket. A balloon? What was she going to do with that? He wasn't sure if it was because he was tired, or just the strangeness in the situation, but Anton stood there, stupified as Samantha began to blow into it.

And blow.

And blow.

Anton's eyes widened as the balloon reached an enormous size. It was almost as big as a building. His eyes fell on Samantha was she pulled something out of her pocket. A pin. Anton's mind quickly pieced together just what was about to happen. As she thrust the pin into the balloon, Anton quickly rubbed his legs together.

The combined boom of sonic energy created a small crater. People nearby were thrown off their feet by the blast. It was like a bomb went off, without the flames.

And once the blast was done, Samantha and Anton was still standing, staring at eachother, blinking in confusion. (Pop! - AoE - missed) (C-Sharp - AoE - missed).

The two of them stared at eachother in silence for a moment, almost unsure what to do. Anton quickly snapped out of it first, suddenly lashing out and kicking Samantha right in the face. (Anton's UT - hit). Samantha gave a small squeak and suddenly the mallet was back in her hand, and braining Anton right in the face. (Samantha's UT - hit). Anton fell like a sack of bricks while Samantha took off into a run. With his ears ringing from the blast, and the built up damage through everything...Anton was just, well, done.

COMBAT TRACKERS:

The next hour or so was a bit of a blur. He wasn't unconscious, but he was barely awake either. That last hit, combined with everything Anton had been through, had made everything around him a blur. The most he could remember was at one point, someone was carrying him along, but even then he couldn't be certain.

When everything finally cleared up, and he could think straight, he was laying in a bed, in the marine base's sick bay. At some point he had reverted back into his human form, and a number of bandages were wrapped around his body. Particularly his face. The upside with having an exoskeleton was that it prevented swelling. Shame that didn't carry over to his human form.

Looking through the bandages, Anton looked around. "Where...?" At that point, Celia moved into view. She was bandaged up as well, though not to the same extent as Anton was. "Thank goodness, you're back," she said, clearly relieved, "When we found you, you were barely coherent. We were worried something had happened to your brain." Well, it was certainly nice to see that his partner cared about him. Anton slowly looked around the sick bay. "What happened...to the pirate?" Celia's face fell. "I'm afraid she was able to escape while you were out of it." She rubbed the back of her neck, as if massaging out some pain, "Honestly, I didn't expect that clown to pack such a punch."

Anton let out a small groan as he looked back up at the ceiling. They had been counting on him, and he had failed...again. Really, it was amazing why anyone thought he would be a good marine. Even with his Devil Fruit abilities, he either needed someone to bail him out, or he'd just fail outright. "Well," he muttered to himself, "Maybe they'll throw me out of the marines now, after all of this."

A small sound from Celia caused him to turn his head to look at her. She had the expression of someone who was about to give some very, VERY bad news. "Well, you see. While you were out chasing her, some news came into headquarters. They...want you out on assignment once you recover..."

the wail of utter despair was heard all throughout the base.

[END]

Unfortunately, there was a small error in the calculation of the EXP and berries here.

The exp rewards should add up to 75, not 125.
50 base + 0 from difficulty + 0.50*50 from the quality score
= 50 + 0 + 25 = 75.

The monetary rewards should add up to 10,125,000 berries, not 16,875,000.
250k*27 base + 0 from difficulty + 0.50*(250k*27) from the quality score
= 6,750,000 + 3,375,000 = 10,125,000 berries.

@Frenzy I shall leave it up to you to reduce the EXP by 50 and recalculate the updated balance. Thank you!

@Anton La'croix Also, whenever you get knocked out, you must choose for one of your equipment pieces to break. Please inform myself or Alice which equipment you'd like to have broken. You will lose the stat bonuses from that equipment until such time as you have it repaired in the Shop of Dreams.